STEVEN

Those who have followed my blog have noticed that I have pitiful taste in men. A wanna be pimp, a cop who stole my car, the guy that wanted me for a brood mare, the stalker, and many I haven’t told you about yet and some I won't mention. All I can say is that I started down this path really young-- first grade to be exact.

Steven caught my eye that first eventful day of school that I wrote about here. His really nice blond curly hair, sprinkle of freckles, killer smile, and the fact that he was NOT one of those laughing at me, attracted me immediately. I thought he was adorable. An instant first crush was formed before I even understood the term “crush.” I just knew I wanted to be around Steven.

I let Steven determined my actions. I only obeyed the teacher if Steven did. When she declared after lunch that first day that it was “nap time” I was appalled. Naps were for babies. This was supposed to be the grown up school that I had waited anxiously all my brief life to attend.

I refused to put my head down on my desk to “nap” till I saw Steven drop his head. Then I did also, but with my head turned so I could watch the back of Steven's head. Oh, yeah, I was smitten. I followed him around to the point of stalking.

Girls do mature faster than boys and Steven was not interested in the least in a “cootie filled” girl. I was not the only girl who liked him though and I decided bribery was called for. On allowance day, I would pocket my dime and await Mondays and school eagerly. That was when I would try to buy Steven with candy.

After school if he had been attentive enough, we would go to the candy store across from school and I would blow my allowance on him. Steven was quite easily bought and was all mine as long as the money held out. As penny and nickle candies quickly eat up a dime, he would lose interest when it was gone.

The other girls who liked him saw my approach and would wait for my money to run out, then they also would ply Steven with candy to get his attention till their money ran out. One girl who got a 25 cent allowance was pretty much his favorite.

Inadvertently, I fear I helped to create a 6 year old gigolo. All he had to do for easy candy was smile and pretend to listen. Sound familiar?? Today I am sure he is grossly over weight with diabetes , wheel chair bound, with no original teeth and is pulling his playboy routine in some assisted living home. A hell-er in a Hover-round.

The main thing I learned from my Steven experience was that money couldn't buy love and if I had just waited a bit, boys do catch up. Once their hormones rage you just have to sit back and enjoy the games.

However, through out my life I have attracted or been attracted to the weak of character and spurned the really great guys. Until I started blogging, I wasn't sure why for my Dad who was my main example ( with only one fall from grace ) was a great father and caring husband. He was my yard stick but I kept seeking and being sought by bent branches.

Now thanks to the joys of blogging I believe I may have discovered the source of my 70 year old choice of mate problem. By printing a good portion of my life and those of my family all through out in this blog, I am beginning to see a pattern. It just might be hereditary.

Writing about Mama Fannie, my paternal grandmother whom you recently met, was my light bulb moment. She had fallen for a rogue while my maternal grandmother married a man who spent what was left of the family fortune as fast as he could then skipped town.

Thanks to blogging, I now realize ---it is in my DNA and not a self inflicted character flaw. Phew , what a relief.

Has blogging produced any "light bulb" moments for you???