HELP

I need your mystery solving abilities, advice, and answer to a curiosity question today. I know, I ask a lot but you do have the option of the “delete” button. You won't hurt my feelings.

MYSTERY ( gross alert.)

I love a tub bath and only shower when the hair insists on a shampoo. So, I had taken a shower and head wash in the AM. Now I do enjoy that form of bathing but it just doesn't soothe the old muscles and joints like a good soak in a steaming tub. I like the water so hot that when I get out I look a lot like a boiled shrimp, really pink with ridges.

My shock and disgust was at its very peak when that evening when I went to prepare my lovely bath and saw a half of a Tootsie Roll lying in the middle of the tub. Closer exam, no Tootsie Roll but a decent sized turd. Now I am 71 with diminishing mental capacities, but I knew it wasn't mine— way too small, I am quite proud of my world class poops. Since I have 3 pets, there was no clear culprit.

Being a mom to 4 legged ones, part of my job is to observe what goes into their bodies and what comes out to determine their state of health. Mighty's I pick up in baggies on our walks and I clean out the cats sand box daily. Yes I know my pets poop. This was not familiar poop.

It was too large and wrong color for the cats, would have been Mighty size but his have a really soft texture. This really was of Tootsie Roll consistency. Also, it had no odor which takes it out of cat category. Besides, they love the automatic litter box so I am puzzled.

I am leaning towards Mighty but he has two repaired knees and jumping is no longer an option. I seriously doubt he could clear the tub and not mess up the bath mat hanging on the side.

My options are, some wild creature that has in and out access to my house or possibly a ghost with a still functioning bowel. Any other guesses???

ADVICE

When I left the power company, I kept their health insurance till I hit 65, then retained the prescription drug portion. I do not have, nor do I really want, an HMO. Medicare has served me quite well, even with all the Cancer surgeries.

At present I am not on any regular drugs, thank God, but I realize that could all change with one deep breath as a doctor clears his throat. The statement I got from my insurer showed a HUGE increase in premium, more than double. Time to test the waters.

Do any of you have a reasonably priced, stand alone prescription drug plan you like??? Since I don't buy meds on a regular basis—one script this whole year for the sinus infection ---it doesn't need to be complete coverage. Appreciate any input. Thanks.

JUST CURIOUS

Ryan Reynolds was just chosen as People's sexiest man alive. Now I think he is precious and quite funny, but I really never thought of him as sexy. You know I like Alex O'Loughlin and while I think he is eye candy, I do not necessarily think he is sexy. Might be that really young thing.

The guy I would love to see on their front page just once, is Sam Elliott. Young Sam on left, current Sam on Right. This guy is getting up in years but like Sean Connery, age has been an asset for him. He has the look of a real man, one who would protect you with his life. He has the most amazing voice that could make reading the ingredients off a catchup bottle sound sexy. He also looks like one who could make you squeal happily in the dark.

So curious question, who do you think should have been on the cover of People??

Thanks for any help with any of my three questions.