THE COP AND THE LIGHT POLE

I really wish this were my story and was briefly tempted to claim it as my own but that is not my nature. This happened to a good friend and co-worker at a bank on Florida's east coast. Margie and I worked side by side on the teller line for about 3 years. Do this 8 hours a day, 5 days a week and pretty soon you are finishing each others sentences like an old married couple. We used to laugh that she had mind reading and message sending powers.

Margie was a freckle faced, red haired, very funny lady of Irish descent. One of her talents besides humor was that she could send and receive telepathic messages, honest. Margie would often mentally send her husband Jim messages to pick up needed items on his way home from work as he got off before we did.

Jim said he would be driving by a grocery store on his way home from work and have an overwhelming desire to pull into a grocery story and get bread, milk and hairspray. He said he could understand wanting to pick up bread and milk but hairspray?? He used to laughingly call her "the witch."

She could read my mind, often to my embarrassment. Once in particular, we both had customers. Mine was one of the lawyers who had an office over the bank and she had a nice little old lady. When we both finished, it got as quiet as only banks and libraries can. After a while Margie said out of the corner of her mouth, "You do know he is married don't you?" I don't think she saw anything in my manner as she had been busy herself, but I certainly was thinking he was one good looking guy when she caught me.

I really tried to learn her trick. Trial and error convinced me I probably couldn't receive messages but I was a terrific sender as my thoughts were so intense. Margie's super powers did not figure in this story, I just wanted you to get a feel for this special lady. Her mind reading and wonderful sense of humor made her an interesting and fun co-worker.

Margie had been attending one of the banking classes offered at night at a rival bank in a near by town. It was 9:00 PM and she was heading home from the class, anxious to get home to hubby and child. The streets were pretty quiet and she was going over the class lesson in her mind when she slid through a stop sign. The instant bark of the siren and the flashing blue lights startled her. Oddly, the nearest place to pull her car off the road, was our bank parking lot.

The officer got out and proceeded to inform her of her offense then started to give her a stern lecture on the number of accidents that are caused by failure to obey a stop sign. Trying to buy mercy, she told him she had slowed down but that there was nothing coming and she was careful. The fact that she hadn't seen the patrol car rather proved she wasn't that careful.

The officer then asked her that if he were hitting her on the arm and she asked him to stop, would she want him to just "slow down?" Stop meant STOP. Seeing the logic of his point, she wisely shut up and paid close attention to his lecture. He had a lot of accident statistics stored up and was thrilled at last to be able to impart them on someone. It had been a quiet night for him.

He was about 2 minutes into his lecture when a car blew through the same intersection at a very high rate of speed. Hurriedly, he told her to be careful in the future, jumped into his cruiser and threw it into reverse to get around her car. Stomping on the accelerator , he backed right into our bank's security light pole, almost laying it on the ground.

Totally embarrassed, he jumped out, checking the damage to the pole and his cruiser. He grinned sheepishly at Margie who was both stunned and choking on suppressed laughter. "You know, " he said," I really don't know the statistics for backing into light poles." With that, he jumped back into his cruiser and roared off into the night after the long gone speeder.

The city repaired our pole and the officer, who had an account with us, was forced to come in twice a month to cash his check which was fitting punishment. Even though he had long since learned to laugh about the incident, he would still get red faced every time he had to face Margie at the teller window. We sure enjoyed city paydays.

Last I heard, he had made chief of police. Guess it was safer to the public to get him off the road.