PART TWO--FIRST DAY

 

I was really feeling the urgency so I screwed up the courage and tapped the girl on the shoulder in front of me to asked what one did when they had to go potty.

With a superior air she whispered," You raise your hand and ask the teacher if you can go to the basement. Then you can leave the classroom to go to the bathroom." Clearly a kindergarten graduate.

I was thrilled that "basement" replaced the word "tee-tee" so up shot my hand and I was given permission to leave the class room. Ah --except-- I didn't know where the basement was. I walked out into the hall way and I was all alone in the quiet. Up and down the many hall ways I walked but all I saw were half open doors to other class rooms.

She had said basement, so when I saw stairs leading down, I took them. Down into the bowels of the school I went. Some how I ended up in the boiler room with pipes, dust and huge machinery.

I was almost ready to squat behind a boiler but decided to keep looking. I did have a little couth though it was running out. A tall man in coveralls came into the room as I started to leave. He almost startled the pee out out me.

"What are you doing here?" he asked.

"Nothing. " I muttered into my chest. I wasn't about to tell a strange man of my problem so I scooted past him back up the stairs.

I had not cried when I first got to school but I was thinking seriously about it now. What was I to do? I had been gone quite a while when I finally found my way back to my room. I entered the only place I recognized and slid back into my seat with a severely stressed bladder. All of a sudden, it dawned on me, school stinks. This was torture.

"Ok children," the teacher announced," it is nap time."

With that, all the kids put their heads down on their desks and closed their eyes. The teacher then left the room, probably to go to that darned basement ,where ever it was.

I was in pain now and could wait no longer. I took advantage of the heads down. Carefully, I arranged my new dress around me so it over lapped the seat like a small flowered tent. Then I let it go. Fortunately or maybe not, the seats had indentations for our tiny butts, and I filled them up with warm pee. Nothing spilled over but I was miserable. The rest of the day I sat soaking in my own pee. Some how the glamor of learning tanked.

When the day finally ended and the rest of the kids had left the room, I slid carefully out of my seat to find, there was still a bit of a dampness left. I prayed it would dry by tomorrow.

My brother was waiting to walk me home and I let him prattle on about his day. I couldn't think of anything about my day I wanted anyone to know. I couldn't wait to get home and get out of my wet underwear.

Mother was confused by my quietness and sudden desire for a bath. I had the normal child aversion to water so that was extremely unusual. The most anyone could get out of me through out supper was an head down "OK." while my brothers carried the conversation ball with their adventures.

 Mother got me alone when it was time to tuck me and then the tear dam burst. It had almost the force of the pee hitting the chair. When I calmed down, she promised to go to school with me the next day and straighten out the bathroom situation. I was so relieved. school might not be a bad thing after all if I could just concentrate.

Then as my tears were drying, I traced my name on her arm to show how much I had learned. She was so impressed and I thought ---school might really be fun after all.

It was years later that my mother told me that she was actually thrilled that night to see my tears. She had been feeling so shut out by my eagerness for school and was just glad to be allowed to be a Mom again.

The next day I found out if I had just turned right going out the class room door instead of left, I would not have had a post today. Go figure.

 

So what did my first day teach me?  First off it taught me to locate the nearest bathroom no matter where I am.  A bit sadly, it erroneously  taught me that speed of accomplishing a task trumped care.  I carry that misconception today.  Then I learned something a lot of men have never learned, it doesn't belittle one to ask directions.  Lastly, I learned that those things you wish for that you are convinced will make your life all better, will need work when you get there.