Monday, December 8, 2014

MEN BEHAVING BADLY


It appears for some of us that word verification has suddenly appeared on our comments section that won't go away. It drove me nuts trying to make it go back to normal.   

Inger at Desert Canyon Living has found the solution. 
In Settings - Comments, you click NO for Word Verification, then go to the top of the options, click on  Comment Location,  and select Embedded.

This worked like a charm.  Thank you so much Inger. 

It has been a rough couple of months for me as I have watched people I thought were positive role models turn out to be just nasty old men. Too often we judge actors by the roles they play. That is so wrong but a trap many of us fall into, especially me.  I guess the best we can say is that they are good actors and were convincing in their roles.

The first star to crash and burn was Stephen Collins who had me convinced he was as decent as his character. I really liked that guy and the show 7th Heaven. It was clean, wholesome with great characters.

Then to hear him admit on tape that he encouraged children to fondle him was sickening. He was a better actor than I thought for I never caught a whiff of  his being a pedophile by watching him.

The Bill Cosby debacle about drugging and raping women is shoving me over the cliff of distrust.  This was America's Dad.  He was funny, he was endearing, he was the perfect husband and father. I've been known to quote him.  Well crap.

Now women are coming out of the woodwork with stories of his alleged drugging and raping. I really want this to be untrue but there is entirely too much smoke. Twenty women so far with a 15 year old in the mix. His silence is deafening.

I am hearing from insiders in the business that he was a known womanizer. While I hadn't heard those stories, they would be easier to take. That would have been a major disappointment considering his image, but that he resorted to knock out drugs to have sex with the women is mind boggling.
 
I thought drugging was the option of guys who had no chance using the normal ways of bedding a girl. But I guess if the guy is really lazy and can't be bothered with nuances of seduction, he slips them a pill and proceeds to  "get er done." To me that has all the charm of raping a corpse.  Makes one wonder if he might not be lacking in his equipment and doesn't want anyone to see.

It is a sad day for those of us wanting to believe in the good guys and it rattles our conception of being able to assess another's worth.  Sure am getting tired of all these clay feet.

However, I am certain there is one person  who is delighted in Bill's fall from grace. Steven Collins must be thanking Bill daily for taking the media  heat off of him.

I will still keep believing the best of people but cases like these do shake up my resolve a bit.

I am curious.  Have these stories rattled you like they have me?  Perhaps you thought it not unusual behavior for a mega star or are you just not interested?

36 comments :

  1. There is something in the makeup of these mega stars aka Bill Clinton, etc. Their power is most overwhelming to them and they believe they are untouchable. (Oops, too touchable.) Their charisma woos us all and it is heartbreaking. Bill Cosby, the world's best father, military man, beloved for his intelligence and wit. Who can we trust?

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  2. I've been a fan of Bill Cosby since forever..his standup (or sitdown) comedy routines.. all the years of the Cosby show- which I realize was not all on him,but without him, it never would have worked..even his Fat Albert cartoons. I am just stunned.

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  3. Some compulsions are more dangerous than others.
    I think Grannie Annie stated it quite well.
    I also was shocked by the allegations against Bill Cosby (didn't know the other guy) and did't want to believe it.
    We are all imperfectly human, but I do really think there is something to a level of fame and subsequent adoration that can give one the feeling of entitlement and invulnerability, a bad combination.
    I am not trying to excuse reprehensible behavior in any way, just trying to understand human nature. I really wish the first victim(s) had screamed long and loud, but I guess that is another study in human nature.

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  4. The women in Cosby's past would not have been believed if they spoke up. Fortunately, the environment has changed and now they can tell their stories. And I'll never ever watch another show with him in it. He is a disgusting serial rapist. Who know how many there actually were?

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  5. I have to say that I am shocked to hear these appalling stories, especially about Bill Cosby. I keep hoping they are not true, but the more women that come forward, the more I believe it must be true.

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  6. Big big Bill Cosby fan from very early on. Just went to a Cosby concert several months ago.

    Very very disappointed...no, make that disgusted!

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  7. Never watched 7th Heaven but, the Cosby show was a staple in our house....soooo disappointed.

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  8. It's difficult for me to get all biased and excited over anything that I read or hear in the media. The entertainment people have sold out to the NWO people and smearing a celeb's name is a sure way to get rid of them. The media takes it's orders, as we all know, so how do we know what to believe. Often, bawdy news is a smoke screen to divert attention away from something "sub rosa."
    ????????
    But you do bring up a very interesting subject.

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  9. I struggled not to believe the accusations about Bill Cosby. The first record album I bought as a kid was his album "Why is there Air?" But like you say there's too much smoke for there to be no fire. What bothers me most is that he gave so many speeches to young black men telling them that they should treat women respectfully and be good fathers. Such a hypocrite.

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  10. If fame and fortune and the availability of many who would be quite willing to engage sexually with these men isn't enough, it tells me that their issues are really about something else. Power? Pedophilia? Arousal by abuse? It's their own personal psycho-sexual wackiness. They need to own their outrageous behavior and get lots of therapy.

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  11. Like everyone else, I've been listening to the reports as they pile up, hoping they were somehow untrue. This seems less and less likely now.
    The thought that popped into my mind as I read your post, was, this is the father of several daughters. You would think this would have had an influence on his behavior.

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  12. Where there is power and money (and fame) there may also be a lack of conscience. Powerful people just don't have to act like the rest of us, do they? I'm never really surprised anymore, Patti - it must be old age! What's with everyone using the word verification again? I just checked if to was on in my blog by mistake.

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  13. Grannie Annie,
    Evidently they most often are untouchable. He sure got away with it for a long time.

    Terri,
    I know. I am not sure when I have been so disappointed in someone. I too had followed him for years.

    Olga,
    Sadly, had the first one hollered I doubt anyone would have believed her. I am pretty sure I wouldn't have as his reputation was so solid.

    Djan,
    You are so right. Who would have believed that America's Dad could be such a monster. I wouldn't have years ago. How alone that women had to feel.

    Cheryl,
    Me too. I thought at first it was just someone wanting the limelight. But after so many, I am afraid I do believe them.

    joeh,
    Me too Cranky. I think that is why it is such a downer. He was so special for so long. We all believed.

    Blue Ridge Boomer,
    His show was truly a can't miss and I even enjoyed reruns. What a blow.

    Manzi,
    I am not sure the NWO exists but neither can I say it doesn't. I hope not.

    Stephen,
    I know. He seemed to stand for everything that was good. This is just so hard to accept.

    robin,
    I thought of that also. He could have had all the willing women he wanted. This is a sick act.

    Marty,
    Like you, with the first ones, I thought it was just someone after money or the spotlight. However there are just too many to ignore.

    Barb,
    Yes, some do seem to think they are immune to common decency. I still keep thinking everyone is good. Not quite jaded yet.
    I just saw that the word vert has been added to my account though my settings say otherwise. Hope it is a temporary Blogger glitch.

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  14. Maybe because I heard the Womanizing rumors back in the late 1960's early '70's, which always made me feel he was a little creepy---being married with young children and still fooling around----I remember seeing him in a restaurant back then---a place he was part owner of---flirting with some young women the way a single guy would flirt.....
    I always knew he was incredibly talented and was a part of a ground-breaking history making TV show---"I SPY"....and that it took great courage and the ability to be very very strong in the face of horrific racism.....I never heard the Rape story's till now----and as everyone has said, there are just too many to pretend that maybe none of this is true. His silence on all of this is rather deafening.
    I feel for his wife and his daughters----this has to be really hard for them in every way.....
    I am also sorry that I thought he was creepy back in those early days, but, it turns out he was creepy and more.
    Back in the early days, so much of Cosby's "act" on stage was very family oriented. What happened to him as a boy, and so much of what happened in his young family; his children, etc......Meanwhile, he was, it seems, drugging and raping many women.It is all very very sad in every way. I understand why these women never spoke up---who would have believed them....but once someone finally did---it seems the floodgates just opened up and who knows how many more there are---some, who still won't speak up.....
    I wonder if he will address any of this, ever?
    In the recent past, before ll the Rape Revelations, I saw him on Jimmy Fallon and I thought his behavior very very bizarre....He seemed like maybe he was 'losing it', or something/ He had become this eccentric old coot! This made me sad, too....

    He is a human being and flawed as all of us are in some ways---unfortunately his flaws are really and truly unacceptable behavior, in every way imaginable. Once again....very very sad, in every way.

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  15. I learned what to do about the WV:
    In Settings - Comments, you click NO for WV, then go to the top of the page where it says Comment Location and select Embedded. Someone advised me and I did it and I am OK.

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  16. It does look bad, and that is sad for all of those effected. There are women behaving badly as well... but no one seems to care.

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  17. The case against Cosby gets stronger every day. It's certainly disappointing, but I never put much store in actors or other famous people. They are not anyone I would consider a role model.
    The real concern is his victims, women who have carried this burden for such a long time. Now finally they can speak the truth and be believed.

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  18. I was stunned at the stories of both men. Now I wonder how many more are out there...God help them, and all those taken advantage of.

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  19. Naomi,
    He did break down a bunch of barriers with I Spy. That is to his credit, none of this other stuff is. You were correct in your judgment years ago.

    Inger,
    Thank you so much. That came out of nowhere and was driving me nuts.

    Brighid,
    Sadly, when women behave badly unless they are mothers, they don't inflict the same damage.

    Linda R.
    It must be such a relief for these victims to finally be heard and believed. What a thing to carry with you.

    pattisjarrett,
    Hopefully now more will feel the courage to come forward. I give those ladies credit.

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  20. Interesting article in today's NYTimes. Thought you might appreciate it.
    http://www.nytimes.com/2014/12/09/health/when-rapists-weapon-is-a-drug.html?hp&action=click&pgtype=Homepage&module=second-column-region&region=top-news&WT.nav=top-news

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    1. Thanks robin that was an interesting article that reinforces the opinion that he is one sick puppy.

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  21. I agree with Robin that there is much more to the issue than sex. I do believe that it was common knowledge that Cosby was a womanizer for many years. When my husband's company had Cosby as the guest speaker for their annual convention years ago it was common knowledge that he was accompanied by (and shared hotel space with) a woman not his wife.

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    1. I agree with you both about him having problems besides sex. Interesting that out of my modest amount of followers, two of you actually saw him behaving badly. Somehow I missed hearing about that at the time.

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  22. Over the last few years I have not only been disappointed in what Hollywood people, sports people and politicians have done but even some people I have known for years that are not rich and famous. We just never know what goes on behind closed doors until it is revealed to us. So sad and sickening to me all of the sexual and physical abuse that goes on. Makes it hard to trust people any more. Hugs sweet Patti and give the sweeties some nose kisses for us.

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  23. I hope he feels the entire world thinking of him as the scum that forms on the side of a pan of boiling hot dogs. Bill, that is.

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  24. It's got me rattled a bit. I can't wrap my head around Dr. Huxtable as a rapist...

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  25. My take on all this was to tell my basketball players to be careful about idolizing famous athletes too much as on the average their no better or worse than the average run of people. That obviously holds for other types of "celebrities" as well....:(

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  26. I think I already commented, but wanted to also add that I've just been ignoring that number verification on blogs and just clicking comment- and it goes right through. I think Blogger is having a bad hair day/week..let's hope not month.

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  27. I haven't been able to comment on your blog for weeks!

    We've had our own selection of male stars here on the UK that really have shocked me. Jimmy Saville and Rolf Harris, plus many others and I feel the same as you, total disappointment. How these guys got away with the shitty things they did for so many years too. In fact Jimmy Saville carried it on his whole career and died before all the terrible things he'd done came to light. Just awful.

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  28. Maggie,
    You are so right about closed doors. Too often what we see is no where near reality--even among friends. Loss of trust is an awful loss.

    RMW,
    I know, I really, really liked the image he created. Another one bites the dust.

    Peruby,
    That disgusting description pretty much describes him.

    TB,
    Wise words but hard to live by and to put into action. Sadly, we all want people to be nice and just hate it when they are not.

    Terri,
    I have noticed that also. Kind of complete defeats the purpose of blocking spammers.

    Joey,
    So good to see you here. I was certain I had just bored you to death and you'd drifted away. I missed you but understood. I can be wordy.
    I remember that post you did about Jimmy and Rolf and how disgusted you were. We have joined that unhappy club.

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  29. Sorry to say it doesn't surprise me at all. Men just don't seem to be able to handle fame and power well. It's their loss !

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    1. Kind of makes one glad that the fellas in our lives have not been rich and famous.

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  30. This Luckie's owner in Bull Shoals. I tried to activate my blog and no luck yet. Have e-mailed Google. Still have Luckie-now estimated 14 and has lumbar stenosis which we are currently controlling with Imodium. We realize it has and ugly progression and are preparing ourselves for that day. Right now she is her still lovable and active self for and old lady.

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    1. Carol, what a nice surprise to hear from you and to know you and Luckie are doing well. Sorry you are having trouble with your blog. I still have you on my roles so when you post, I'll be there.
      Don't know if you read but I lost my Mighty Dog after 16 years. I now have a new dog, Callie who is helping to fill the void he left.

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  31. It is sad. Like seeing Hitler in the White House...it's just not supposed to happen.

    I have lost your email and cannot reply personally. Thanks for your comments and prayers.

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  32. I admit I've been in shock. I used to watch his family show religiously and loved it and him. I've listened to his monologues and really believed he was a great guy. This whole thing just boggles your mind.

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