Monday, May 16, 2016

PLUS SIDE OF WHITE HAIR


I know it is really easy to moan about aging. Chronic pains creep in.  Serious disease that requires expensive medication may take up residence.  Perhaps just the not being able to do the things we use to do with ease or sometimes at all can darken a day. So where are the pluses you ask?

I personally  think there are almost as many pluses as minuses. I no longer live tied to the clock--well except on doctor appointment or luncheon days. I no longer work for a living. Every month a check magically appears in my bank account that I did not work for. But you say--that check was earned years ago.

I never thought of those FICA payments I made for 46 years as being my future. I felt it was my way of helping to take care of my grandparents and then my parents in an almost painless way. Now it is the job of my younger relatives to take care of me in the same way. Thanks kids.

I know some of you keep as busy now if not more so than when you worked. I don't try to fill my dance card daily and love this freedom to time manage.  But besides that freedom, there are other pluses to this white hair period.

When we ladies were younger the opposite sex would come to our aid fairly easily. Just standing by a car on the side of the road with a flat tire and in no time, gentleman of all ages would stop to help.

As we packed on a few more years and pounds on, the wait on the side of the road became a wee bit longer but rescue always came. Chivalry is not dead.

Then as we became AARP eligible, it was usually the youngish man who stopped to help as he mentioned that you reminded him of his mother or even--gasp--his grandmother.

Finally the hair turned white and all sorts of opportunities opened up. Everyone stops quickly now to help--- including men and women of all ages.  Doors are opened not in a flirtatious manner but in a helpful one that will make the opener feel good about themselves for the rest of the day. It becomes almost impossible to lift anything heavy in public.  Seats are offered on public transportation.  We have fallen into the same category as pregnant women.

Yep, I'm a white headed old lady and am working it. I no longer have to ask for help in the garden center. All I have to do is stand by the large bags of garden soil that once were easy to lift but not so much today. I can still lift them but it isn't pretty. Even folks who don't work there help me.

I had one of my car's headlights burn out this week so I went to the auto store to get a replacement. The young fellow behind the counter offered to put it in for me and I let him. All he wanted was a big smile and to feel good. I gave him the first gratefully and am pretty sure he enjoyed the latter.

Last week I took my sick lawnmower to the dealer who has worked on it before. He listened to me briefly, diagnosed the problem and was able to fix it in a few minutes without even unloading it from the trailer.  "No charge," he insisted with a big grin.

White hair is now my money maker. I am certainly not helpless but I have no problem accepting help with heavy lifting and enjoy the opportunity of making someone fell good about themselves.

You men know where you fit in this post and we love you for it.  Most of you are still in the getting to feel good about yourselves stage. Lucky for us, along with the desire for sex,  helpfulness seems to be the last thing to go. And if you have reached a time when you need to lean heavily on a younger or healthier woman, relax and enjoy for you have earned it. Your dues are paid in full.

You women who have hit this milestone know I speak the truth. Those of you who are too young yet, just realize that age may take away many things but it also gives a pretty nice consolation prize beyond free time and senior discounts. Get ready to enjoy and take advantage.

Do you enjoy the benefits of age or are you are still a youngster (anyone under 70 in my books) and are the first to volunteer to help us white haired ones?

44 comments :

  1. Yes, there are definitely compensations for being a septuagenarian. (I love that word.) I even had a wonderful guy carry my backpack down the hardest part of the trail last week. I didn't mind one bit! :-)

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    1. Djan,
      I remember your helpful hiker and it added the nudge for this post. I was pleased that he did and more so that you accepted.

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  2. I've been white-haired for a long time, even though I only just celebrated my 64th birthday. Someone wrote me and said in our 60s we are the young old. White hair does have its advantages, and I am looking forward to more as I cross the threshold to 70. You are the role model for that!

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    1. robin,
      Yes, you are in the youth of old age and that is a good place to be. I remember my 60s fondly. Don't fear the 70s, they haven't been bad either. Your activity and attitude will make it a breeze.

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  3. Stil color my hair, but thinking about going naturally gray, and the benefits you cite will make the transition less painful! As you say, there is a lot to look forward to...

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    1. Meryl,
      Hope you do go natural. It is freeing and also full of advantages. Enjoy the new experience. The good thing is that if you don't like it, you are only one bottle away from before.

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  4. I'm a young whipper snapper at sixty-one but my white hair does get some attention.

    I enjoy opening doors and helping with all ages. In stores I might go three isles over to help someone find what they're searching for. I think it is good manners no matter the age. I am grateful sometimes I am the helper, others the helpee.

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    1. Gail,
      Ah, you are enjoying the best of both worlds. You go girl. Even at my age, I still find folks that can use a helping hand from me. It's one of the easiest feel good things we can do for ourselves.

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  5. i will have to confess that I am still a little snotty about refusing help when i can do it myself--stubbornly independent. I will try to be nicer from now on.

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    1. Olga,
      I use to be just like you and would get testy if a bag boy offered to take my groceries out. I would tell them that the time would come when I would need that help but it hadn't come yet. I still get the groceries but gratefully accept help with 40 pound bags of dirt.

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  6. My daughter says we get FAR better service at restaurants and stores because we're seniors.

    I think it's your smile that does it all the time, Patti.

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    1. Kay,
      That was one I hadn't thought of but you are right. I often sit with a table full of old ladies and the wait staff fall all over themselves for us.
      I've seen your smile and it is money in the bank. Throw in your Mom's smile at the same time and you probably don't need to tip:))

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  7. Old age would be a lot easier if things (like moving) didn't hurt!!

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    1. Fran,
      I feel your pain--I mean really. I have a back I'd love to trade in. That is one of the minuses.

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  8. I guess I am still a youngster, but 60 is on my horizon. I've been watching different parts of me sag and bag and start to creak and hurt for at least the last five years. I do believe my youth left the building entirely too early. But yes, I always try to help anyone who looks like they need it.

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    1. Terri,
      Ah, you are still a puppy yet. Sorry about the rusting. All I can say is that you will get use to it. Keep helping others like you do now and the feel good part will ease any aches.

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  9. I will help ladies of all ages when needed, but I am not above playing the "Old Man"card from time to time to get a little special attention. It is especially helpful at stores and with any customer service people. Where they used to answer questions with sarcasm and disdain, when you play the "old man" card they get very helpful.

    Love this, Terrific post!

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    1. joeh,
      I remember that post where you played the "old man" card and I got a chuckle out of it. It is great to have those cards in our possession. They are quite rewarding. So glad you enjoyed.

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  10. I am loving being in my 70's and enjoy helping others and others helping me when I need help. I do for myself what I can but happily take the help from others when there is something I can't do. Retirement is wonderful! Hugs sweet Patti...fun read and subject. Nose kisses for Callie and Minnie.

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    1. Maggie,
      Yes it is. Being in our seventies is not a scary time is it?

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  11. Great post, Patti! Heck, I think by the time we reach our 70's we've earned a little help. I'm still happy to be able to assist others, too - even some younguns. Helping others is good for both giver and receiver.

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    1. Barb,
      Me too. When I was younger I was fiercely independent. Now days it is good to give help but also to accept it. Think of all the days we made for people on both sides of the coin.

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  12. Spot of Patti! I'm 69 and three quarters, and I do enjoy being this age. Lucky that I'm still able to do most of the things I used to do with joy and abandon! (though I don't know about the sex part these five years since the Cowman died, but I'm pretty sure I will remember how),

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    1. Brighid,
      Ah, still a youngster by a quarter anyway. Now if you would just let your Dad fix you up:))

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  13. I'll happily help anyone female or male, young or old, carry stuff around. I love the fact I still have the muscles to do it. I'm not looking forward to the time when I don't!

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    1. Joey,
      It is guys with muscles like you that are rapidly becoming my favorites. You have a long way to go before you have to think about that but don't fear it--just relax and go with the flow.

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  14. Well, I never thought of myself as a youngster, but I guess I qualify at 64!

    My mom, 86, plays it to the hilt. She has the sweetest smile and sweetest voice when asking someone for help. Office staff, shop keepers and strangers on the street all treat her like gold. I'm taking notes :-)

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    1. Carole,
      Ha ha, enjoy your youngsterville:)) Gotta love your Mom. Think of all the people she makes happy with that smile and sweet voice.

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  15. I haven't yet reached that point...still working for about 32 more months though I do get a senior's discount at Denny's. ;)

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    1. Eileen,
      Oh are you going to love retirement and way to go on the senior discount. Do you also get the free senior drink they offer?

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  16. I am a firm believer in riding this 'old' routine as far as I can. I have no qualms about speaking of myself as old if it will get me what I want. I love this period of my life. Just wish it could be longer but only if I could remain healthy.

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    1. Linda,
      Yes, a lady after my own heart. Way to go. Ignoring it would be like letting money lay on the ground.

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  17. I am still transitioning at age 71. I don't really think of myself as needing to be treated as an old person. Besides, I have a husband who can still do all this stuff. But I will keep this in mind for the future.

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    1. Linda R,
      Yep, you are barely out of the youngster age and the way you work, you will probably stay youngsterish for a long while. You do have a keeper husband.

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  18. What an interesting perspective! My hair is not gray yet but I notice a difference in how people respond to me now that I am obviously "elderly", and I agree with you, I kinda like the respectful attention these days. The flip side is that I am also more patient and respectful of others in return. I realize I am not the center of everyone's universe, and that's just fine with me.

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    1. Connie,
      Thank you and I feel the same way. Isn't it nice to make someone's day? Equally as nice as when you can help our someone yourself.

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  19. Perhaps I would get more help if I ditched the wig and just went around with my bald head shining. I might give it a try.

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    1. Annie,
      Let us know how that works for you:) I do think they make wigs in grey if you want to try that also.

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  20. Good post. True post
    I've never seen me in white hair. It's always been covered with henna. I've used henna since I was in my 20's. Henna doesn't show a demarcation line, it just fades all together (and it's natural). I don't even know what color my hair really is but I'm not ready to find out as I still have many boxes of henna stashed away. Haha

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    1. Belva,
      Anyone who can get Godfather's Pizza to throw hay bales for her doesn't need white hair:)) Keep going with the henna. It is working and looks good on you.

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  21. My hair is gray enough to tell my age (as if my face didn't) but I really wish it would be all white. I do enjoy life as an old lady. And it's terrible to say, but I do see one of the benefits as the fact that I won't be around to see the results of our current divided country.

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  23. Well no white hair for me just no hair. As to all the free help I may have to look into this transgender thing....

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  24. I think that you have earned that help that you are accepting from others :) and by the way, I always just refer to it as albino hair :)

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