Monday, August 22, 2016

REDNECK ROMANCE RERUN

Right now I am in the peak of Hummer season.  They are swarming  and two quarts of nectar daily are needed to keep them happy.  I posted this in 2011.

 REDNECK ROMANCE

I was very lucky the other day to spot something I have never seen in all my years of Hummingbird watching.

I was heading towards the house from the shed when I saw what I thought was a Hummer suicide attempt.

The little fellow flew straight up in the air at incredible speed then hung in mid-air for a second at the top of a very high arc. He was just a speck. Then he dove straight for the ground in an apparent attempt to end it all.  Just feet from the ground, he pulled up and zoomed toward the sky again.

I had no idea what I was seeing but I continued to watch. I was not the only one watching. From her perch on the feeder, his dives were admired by a sweet young thing that I swear I could see smiling.

Not sure this is same pair but these two did a nice reenactment of the initial meeting for me  
He then flew in confidently and sat near her on the perch. He ruffled his glorious ruby throat and it glistened in the sun. I could swear I heard the Hummingbird equivalent to,  "Hello there, I'm Mr. Right. Someone said you were looking for me."

Her back was to me so I didn't see her response. What I did see was the red necked Lothario, leave his perch, hover over her back side, and drop down for a whopping few seconds on her behind.

He took her right at the dinner table and I am not sure she even quit slurping nectar during the process.   In about 3 seconds, he was finished  and flew off to spread his seed elsewhere. And I thought bunnies were fast.

That was it folks. A little showing off with some high dives, a quickie, then he goes off to play with some new female  and she is now a single mother. Yikes.

When you look at the whole picture, male Hummingbirds have atrocious table manners. They  are always quarreling pushing and shoving. Their love making is pretty close to date rape and they are no-show fathers. They want no part of being a parent. For some reason, this seems to work for the species.

Even with all that going against the little dudes, I am still enamored with the adorable little rascals and am totally forgiving (probably since I am not a female Hummer).

Those little red necked lovers really rely on cute carrying them past bad behavior.  Works for me as long as it is only a tiny bird behaving badly and not a member of the human species trying such antics.  Then cute carries no weight. 

Needless to say, I have scratched lady Hummingbird off my list as a creature to come back as.

So if you ever see a Hummer taking a high altitude dive, stick around for a second and don't blink. You may get to witness what I did.

39 comments :

  1. Those males are also very aggressive towards other males, I guess because they don't want someone else to have even a few seconds with the female! I've never seen the dive, only read about it. I keep hoping. Love this post, Patti! :-)

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    1. Djan,
      Just don't blink or you will miss the whole thing. The dive is the best part.

      Delete
  2. Great post! I have a feeder, but no where near the traffic that you have. I've always wondered about the darting and diving while trying to feed. I want to yell out "there is plenty for all to share".

    I've read that they are able to cross the gulf of Mexico when they head south during the winter. Not sure how they manage that, since they need to feed so frequently. Love my hummers. They provide wonderful entertainment.

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    1. Carole,
      I have heard about their migration and it is mind boggling considering their size and how hard they work just to fly to the feeder. I love watching them also.

      Delete
  3. Rapist Hummingbirds. At least they put on a show for the gals. My rapist roosters simply jump on and off and move on to the next. My dog Slim does not appreciate this behavior and will break up the chickens at every opportunity. Glad you are back to make us laugh. I laughed so hard I cried at the Hummingbird activity.

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    1. Ha ha, you go Slim. I once saw ducks mating and I tried to break it up thinking they were fighting. Fowl evidently don't believe in foreplay.

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  4. Sounds like hummingbird porn to me.

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    1. The porn birds last for 5 or 6 seconds.

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    2. Stephen and Joeh,
      Trust me, Hummer's sex wouldn't sell and are you sure about that 5 06 6 seconds joeh. My what stamina.

      Delete
  5. Hummingbirds are aggressive beyond their size. Tis time of year I can sit on my deck only if I have a fly swatter in hand. Just joking, but I do threaten them when they start buzzing my head.

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    1. Olga,
      They really have attitudes especially early in the season. Right now both of my feeders have a bird at every port. They have learned to get along.

      Delete
  6. Wow, you do have a lot of hammers. We had one hummer when we moved in here and still have one hummer and we've never put out a feeder.

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    1. Linda,
      I really do. Last year I was making 3 quarts a day. I think ATF will be investigating me with all the sugar I am buying. Might think I am working a still.

      Delete
  7. Oh My Goodness.... I have NEVER seen that --but would love to see it.... Kinda like "Slam Bam Thank You, M'am" huh?????? ha ha

    You are just SO lucky to have been in the right place at the right time.... Love it.

    Hugs,
    Betsy

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    1. Betsy,
      Ha ha, not sure they even get to the "thank you m'am" part. I really was pleased to have caught it. Seconds later I could have missed it.

      Delete
  8. I've never had hummers but this story is hilarious. If they ever decide to visit me, I'll be watching for this kind of action.

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    1. Barbara,
      So glad you enjoyed it. It tickled me when it happened. If you do see the dive, don't blink or turn away or you will miss it.

      Delete
  9. Loved the story. So glad you reposted.

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    1. pattisjarrett,
      Thank you so much. I thought it was fun and could stand a rerun.

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    2. Fran,
      One more in the plus column, thanks so much.

      Delete
  10. I had no idea! I wonder if the dive is to separate the bright male hummers from the dumb ones? Survival of the fittest and all that.

    I've never been able to attract hummingbirds to my yard, but my brother has. I'll have to ask if he's ever watched hummer porn. :)

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    1. Eileen,
      I am sure you are right. After all, those who can't pull up before the ground are automatically eliminated:)

      Delete
  11. I know about none of this. We have hummers in our yard, but I only see them flitting around flowers. I'm obviously missing out.

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    1. Linda R,
      You might be but the Hummers aren't missing a thing in your yard. You have enough nectar for an army of them.

      Delete
  12. We had a hummer nest in a tree over our driveway. We felt fortunate indeed because we were able to see nest, mamma and babies quite clearly from my bedroom window. I don't have feeders out but they love all my petunias.

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    1. Smartcat,
      So good to see you here. I am so envious of you actually seeing the nesting. As small as the adults are, I can't imagine how tiny the babies are. Lucky you.

      Delete
  13. Hummingbirds are indeed terrible fathers. I always feel so sorry for the females who spend so much energy trying to feed themselves and keep up with feeding the nestlings. And they make at least a three-point diversion trip to keep predators from following their path to the nest.

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    1. Carolyn.
      My hat's off to the lady hummers. They do it all on their own. I didn't know that about the 3-point diversion path to the nest. Now they really are firmly on my bird pedestal.

      Delete
  14. Thanks to you, now I will view the hummingbirds I see in AZ in a completely new way. Mind you they do seem to do everything quickly, so their screwing technique doesn't really surprise me.

    How about coming back as a male hummingbird instead? ;)

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    1. Joey,
      Ha ha, I gave it brief thought but then thought about those 3 seconds and thought-- Nah.

      Delete
  15. I admit it. I blinked. I enjoyed this funny tale and drew many parallels with the human race.

    Bonnie is a doll. We are very fortunate to have her. Our other dogs are aging. Bonnie is the youngest and may be our last.

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  16. Gail,
    Glad you enjoyed and yes sadly there are some parallels.
    Enjoy that beautiful dog. She is a treasure.

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  17. Good gracious, what a bird turd! They aren't as plenty here as normal, but I do have four that have been hanging out for a few days. I wondered where my usual gang have gotten off to. I hope you are getting a bit of this rain..it has been so nice, as it was so stinking hot!

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    1. Terri,
      They are rascals aren't they? I have a lot but I am down a bit. Last year I had to make 3 quarts a day, this year only 2 qts a day. Also the arrived late.
      Yes, the rain has been wonderful.

      Delete
  18. Great take on a bird tactic ! Maybe it's just what the female wanted ... the males who stick around aren't always welcome !

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    1. Ginnie,
      You know you might be right. Maybe they were so annoying at one time that the gals figured they could do better on their own. Interesting.

      Delete
  19. Yikes!!!! Whoda thought of such little creatures...:)

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  20. This is such a fun post, Patti! Would you believe I just saw a nature show about this very thing? Pretty darn amazing how those hummers do that high dive and are able to stop in time and do their thing. No fun for the female, I imagine.

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