Monday, April 21, 2014

HOW COME


As I was watching a baseball player rub the dust out of his eyes a few days ago, a thought hit me. How come, since adult hood, I no longer get eyelashes in my eye?? That use to be rather a regular occurrence in my youth and afflicted my friends also. It was the "ow, ow, I've got an eye winker." This would be followed by some adult or a really handy kid pulling out a hankie, prying open my eye and using the sharp end to fish the offender out. I can not remember the last time that happened.  Am I unique or do we only shed eyelashes as children??

And how come whenever you drop a freshly decorated piece of toast, it always lands on the floor loaded side down?? I accidentally dropped a super hot peanut butter covered roll yesterday morning to prove the point. I miss Mighty Dog, he would have raced to cleaned up the floor while Minnie just gives me a snarky judgmental look and moves not at all to help.  

How come leg cramps come at night just seconds before you are about to drop off to sleep, killing the mood??

How come your hair looks the best when you have no where to go and looks worst when you do??

How come no one comes to visit when you have just cleaned house and washed your windows but insist on dropping in right before you do??

How come every product, line of clothing or food you get hooked on goes out of production while its much lesser wannabes still line the shelves??

How come when you are gardening or doing a nasty chore you usually end up needing something extra from the store.  Though being a bit grubby, you don't bother to change for the quick trip.  That is for sure when you will run into several folks you know and they all want a hug?? Never is it a quick in and out unnoticed. It will probably be a bad hair day also.

How come cat hair tumble weeds can hide from the vacuum cleaner but will dance lazily across the floor for company??

Lastly, how come Hummingbirds can't share?  My first and I am pretty sure the same sweet little lady hummer from last year appeared this past week the same day the temps were to drop to freezing. She hovered beseechingly at my kitchen window so I quickly made some nectar, cooled it and put out the first feeder of the season on my porch. She was so hungry and I delighted in her enjoyment. Her enjoyment however was brief.

Soon a little a--hole boy hummer made his appearance to run her off. Obviously it isn't mating time yet for food was his only thought. Her being female gave her no edge.  That little red necked male was so pushy and aggressive that I fixed another batch and put the second feeder a good 30 feet from the first so they could each have one.

Was he content with his very own feeder??  Nope, he positioned himself on a bush between the two and would swing his head back and forth looking for her and would chase her off when she approached either feeder.  Ever the peacemaker,  I moved one of the feeders to another side of the house. Finally she is getting some brief snacks but I emphasize brief for he is currently circling the house on patrol. His cuteness has worn totally thin.  Bullying is never attractive.

Fortunately when the rest of the gang appears, table manners tend to improve. I usually put out 3 feeders with 6 ports each and I have had all of the ports full of hummers at the same time.  Mob rule I guess.

I love the nest building, baby feeding type of male birds but the hummer male builds nothing and sticks around only long enough to propagate the species. A couple of years ago I was lucky enough to witness a hummer mating and learned they are not only alarmingly quick but those little Lothario's whole goal is to  leave behind the largest number of single moms they can manage. Sheesh.

That is my list of "how comes".  Got some of your own??

39 comments :

  1. Love your list of "how comes," Patti. I'll have to give that some thought. For some reason I just woke up and really didn't want to get up today. I could have slept another couple of hours, and I went to bed at the usual time. How come? :-)

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  2. Your how come list has left me too exhausted to think of any more, Patti. There all good and I think Science needs to be refocused on these down to earth issues so we can have the answers. Yes indeed I do....:)

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  3. You pretty well covered mine too. I had not thought about the eyelash thing but you are right. Toast, leg cramp dance, company when house is a mess. You got it girl. Just yesterday I decided to run to the restaurant when the Easter crowd was bound to be gone. I was already in my work clothes. You can guess Paul Harvey's "The rest of the story."

    Oh wait, I can add the clumsy trip and almost fall then glance around hoping no one saw and guess what...there's the smile.

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  4. Oh gosh this is a wonderful list of how comes and hahas. My biggest and most recent one is how come when I can no longer get down on my knees do I see things that need to be done and can only be achieved by getting down on "my knees"? When I mentioned this to my ortho guy, he said that on your knees is not all it's cracked up to be. Yeah, he can say that, the young pup still can.
    I have to turn a blind eye to the hummers or I would be out there mediating more than I already am. They are natures 6th grade boys and 9th grade girls. The two ages I had the most "irk" factor for when I worked with kids. Annoying is the only term....but cute.

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  5. I doubt if eyelash sheading has anything to do with age as I get eyelashes in my eyes quite frequently. I do know we tend to grow less hair so maybe you're not growing as many. Yeah, that toast thing bugs me too. I wonder if it has something to do with the weight of the peanut butt/ butter?

    What kind of hummingbird feeder do you have? Last year I bought 2 different kinds and they both leaked. I'd fill them and notice that within an hour they'd be empty. Ummm, hungry little guys, untill I saw all the red stuff dripped down the fence and on the ground.

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  6. HA---I love your "how come lists".... I guess we could all add things to the list... Right now, I keep asking myself: "How come 'I' have a stinkin' ole cold (or allergy or something) which makes me feel pretty dad gum miserable?" WHY ME???? Gripe gripe gripe... ha ha

    Hugs,
    Betsy

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  7. It's Murphy's Law or something like that. I have wondered all those things at one time or another. I do shed eyelashes; I find them on my cheeks or rarely, in my eye. (ouch)
    I don't know about the hummers, as my experience with them is slight.

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  8. Quite awhile back in my history, I used to always ask "How come I am the only one that sees the rats?" at one of the horse stables I fed during the summer months. Others would swear they never saw one and these amazingly large rats came out every time I walked into this 4-horse barn.

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  9. Love your "how-comes." I am all too familiar with most of them.

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  10. How good of you to move the feeder around for the girl. I didn't know they were such bad boys. We have house finches nesting next to our front door. I see the male there too. Hope he's nicer.

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  11. All worth pondering.
    I am always wondering why hummingbirds can't seem to get along. My father-in-lw did not like hummingbirds at all--"mice with wings."

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  12. OK, hee's one that gets to me every time. How come when I am thinking how full I am do I feel hungry within five minutes....an it turns out to be about 5 hours after eating a meal?

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  13. Great consideration of "how comes."

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  14. Funny post. And I enjoyed the comments as well.

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  15. How come I have three open hours this afternoon and, instead of working on useful tasks, I'd rather take a nap?

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  16. Someone told me this week if you have leg cramps to keep a bottle of tonic water on your bedside table and take a big drink. It will stop the cramp in less than a minute. I have no idea if this works or not but it's worth a try. I think it's maybe quinine in the water? blessings, marlene

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  17. I can only ponder the same things you do..I have no enlightenment. My one boy hummer is currently running 7 females ragged on three feeders. I bought another one this morning at Wally World (and was quite upset to see how cheap the quality of these plastic feeders has gotten, and how expensive at the same time). LOL Have a great week and find a hidey hole if these crazy storms come your way.

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  18. Djan,
    Gee that sounds like every day for me. I say cave and stay put.

    TB,
    I agree, science really needs to tackle these. Thanks.

    Grannie Annie,
    Oh, I have been there too many times:)) I agree about stumbles. They always seem to gather an audience.

    Linda W.
    Think you nailed on the age group appropriateness of Hummers. Aggravating little buggers aren't they.

    Manzi,
    Oops that makes me the odd one out. Judy still gets them also.
    I love this feeder.
    http://www.amazon.com/First-Nature-32-ounce-Hummingbird-Feeder/dp/B003R2SKIC/ref=sr_1_9?ie=UTF8&qid=1398091662&sr=8-9&keywords=best+hummingbird+feeders
    It comes totally apart for easy cleaning.

    Betsy,
    Oh no!! I am so sorry you are sick. That is a real "how come."

    Judy,
    You aren't missing much with Hummer behavior. They are adorable with awful manners.
    You and Manzi kill my only in childhood notion about eyelashes.

    Sue,
    That is a perfect example. You much have some Irish blood to be a rat whisperer.

    Pat,
    They really are pretty universal aren't they.

    Cranky,
    Thanks, I know you have a few also.

    Inger,
    At least the house finches help with the raising of off spring. I'd forgive a lot if the hummers were like that.

    Olga,
    Now that made me laugh. Mice with wings.

    Nan,
    Boy is the mind a powerful thing. I keep thinking I should only eat when I am hungry instead of when it is time.

    LC
    Glad you approve.

    NCmountainwoman,
    Thanks I do have the best commenters. Only reason I keep posting.

    Linda M.
    Actually, I consider a nap a very useful task:)) Hope you enjoyed.

    Marlene,
    Thank you for sending me on a Google quest. Quinine might just also prevent them. Also learned dehydration is a big cause.

    Terri,
    What greedy monsters those red necks are. I did find my favorite feeder at Walmart but they don't carry it any more. It comes completely apart for cleaning.
    Hope the weather stays peaceful for us both.

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  19. I enjoyed your "how come" list sweet Patti. I have no answers for any of them though. Those little male hummers are not the only bullies, we have some male finches here that are right down mean. I wonder how as many females survive that do since the males are so mean to them. I guess they manage to get enough food to survive but it is not right they should have to work so hard to get it. Hugs!

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  20. The bad hair/good hair day on the list is probably my constant. AND getting caught at the store when I run out to grab something.

    I've never had any luck attracting hummingbirds to my yard. I have mostly containers so perhaps I'm not growing the correct items.

    But if the boys are such big bullies, I'm not sure I'd want them to visit!

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  21. How come we have the same list? Are we kin? Would that be Ok with you?

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  22. I think the loaded side of your toast is heavier, which is why it falls face down. This was a fun post.

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  23. What a fun post! I'll just stick with your list for now. it's wonderful!

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  24. I think you've hit most of the "how comes" I could think of, especially the hair and cleaning house ones. Never fails, when I want to look nice, my hair will look awful, but when I'm not going anywhere it'll turn out great.
    I'll add a "how come". How come I escaped getting a cold or flu bug all winter long (dizziness doesn't count, that's a separate issue) and then when spring FINALLY arrives, I get the cold from h&ll?
    Great questions and post, Patti! Take care.

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  25. Maggie,
    Sure makes one hope they don't come back a small bird.

    Eileen,
    It is better you don't see it then you can still think they are adorable birds.

    Brighid,
    Absolutely.

    Stephen,
    That is an answer I can get behind.

    Linda R.
    Thank you. That is a list no one really wants to add to.

    Cheryl,
    Aww, I am so sorry your are sick but if it is any consolation, it seems a lot of the late winter colds are going around. You are not alone.

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  26. After seeing the Maury Povitch show I think the male of the human species is much like the male humming bird. He leaves single mothers scattered about as well. As Maury sayd..... "He IS the father"

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  27. Dear Arkansas Pattie, your list of "How comes" made me realize just how often that question niggles at my mind. Just this morning when I was doing my writing on the "Morning Pages" of the book The Artist's Way, I wrote about a How Come. It was "How come I say that writing is important to me. It is prayer. And it centers me. And I want to do it faithfully and yet . . . I fail to write regularly? How come I talk such a good game but can't act it?" Peace.

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  28. You've got it covered as far as I can tell.

    Maybe "How come the power always goes out when you have something delicate in the oven?"

    I had to stop feeding the hummingbirds because I couldn't keep up with the feeders while I was at work and they were so aggressive if I just put out nectar in the evening, that it took a lot of the fun out of it...

    Maybe I'll try this year. I do have a Sparrow Hawk hanging around and I am really hoping she nests somewhere close by!

    xxoo,

    RMW

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  29. I have no answers to the questions. I do wonder the same thing. How come I can't think of new ones after I read yours? Wait, I have one. How come every time I put on a clean white shirt or blouse to go somewhere, I spill coffee down the middle? How come it is a new white top, I will always ruin it on my first wearing by spilling coffee down the front?

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  30. Thank you so much for your comment and for finding that post about bullying. I don't think I understand how you accomplished this, but I am very grateful. I may post it again after this challenge is over. I read it and I think it has a lot to say. Bullying is so horrible because children can't see the whole picture, can't know that it will pass. Thanks again.

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  31. Hi Patti, Surely Murphy's Law applies here! I'm in AZ and seeing hummers - I'm in Heaven!

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  32. Oklhdan,
    Ha, too bad we can't hold the redneck hummer's feet to the fire also.

    Dee,
    Yes. I can so relate to that very one. Someday I hope to learn to walk the walk or quit talking the talk.

    RMW,
    Oh yea. Since I use to get my water via well, the power also seemed to fail when I had a head full of shampoo.

    Sally,
    Me too and I do so love to wear white. I usually spill on my way to a meeting. I'm thinking bib these days.

    Inger,
    I left you a comment on how to search your own blog. Someone told me so I am passing it on.

    Barb,
    Wow, warmth, good friends and hummers. Does it get any better?

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  33. How come I can't read on my own deck without being attacked by those darling little humming birds? I can't believe that such sweeties can be so vicious !

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  34. I was amused to read about the bullying humming bird, I could "see" the little fellow in my mind's eye as I read your account. We once watched a sea gull behave in a similar manner, in fact he was so aggressive and tried to own any food that was given, that he rarely had any for long, as he was too busy rushing around seeing off intruders into what he considered to be his territory.. and his territory was far too big to defend! I almost found myself feeling sorry for him, even though I didn't like his behaviour!

    Regarding eyelashes and body hair.... Much as I don't enjoy my head turning into a shining mirror to the sky, I do find that there are advantages on a wet day, in that water just runs off! I do still occasionally have the odd eyelash try to share the same space that my eyeball occupies, so my advancing age hasn't cured that one as yet.

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  35. Oh Patti! Your posts are always like desserts. This is no exception. It was so much fun to read. I loved your list. You pretty much covered everything. Your hummer post was hilarious too. Since I rarely see hummers, this was very enlightening.

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  36. I love YOUR list! Funny about the eyelashes--you're right!

    Why do my eyebrows keep getting thinner? Have they migrated into my nostrils?

    Why does our dog sit in front of me to clean her privates?










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  37. Hi Patti, I just read about the tornadoes in Arkansas and stopped in to email you, but didn't find an address. Hope you are okay!! Let us know when you can. Take care!!

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  38. Ginnie,
    I know, try wearing a bright colored shirt and they get right in your face.

    Peter,
    I too have noticed that sea gulls tend to reflect the human population. In a group you will see the aggressive, the shy,and the opportunistic. I always give the shy the most opportunities.

    Mary lee,
    Ha, cats are also notorious for that very thing. They are exhibitionists aren't they?

    Cheryl,
    Thank you so very much for your caring. I will email you this morning.

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