Monday, March 5, 2012


First off, I can't thank you all enough for making a really bad time for me just a bit more bearable. I was truly blindsided by the loss of my friend and how empty my life suddenly became. All your kind and caring thoughts reached through cyberspace. I felt your touch and it was warm.

I still can't think of her nor see all the things she has sent me through the years without feeling the pain of loss. I look forward to the time when these thoughts and things will bring warm smiles and memories as they should.

However, that time is getting nearer thanks to all of you who took time to reach out. My blog buddies with tender messages, my sister who read the post and made the call (thanks Jan), a good friend here who also made the call (thank you Julie), and my brother who knew nothing about my loss but also called helping to establish a bit of normalcy.

Then Saturday, a luncheon with 18 of my support group helped restore my balance somewhat. Thank you all so very much. Not sure what I would have done with out all that help.


On a lighter note, I did ask for you all to name my new fish a few posts ago. I was really impressed with the creative names you all came up with and wish I had a bunch more fish to apply them. I used the scientific method to select the name, I drew one out of a bowl.
Oops a glass bowl doesn't show up.

 Of course the winner gets nothing outside of bragging rights. That is unless the winner would like a cat with a really bad gas problem. That could be arranged:))

And the winning name for that feisty little blue fish is -----FINN.

Thanks Suzanne from Islandwonder, for that name has double meaning. Finn for his obviously flowing fins, but also Finn is an Irish name and we Irish are pretty well known for our pugilistic personalities. Somehow I missed that gene for I am a weenie personified.

Thanks to all of you who participated. I am so glad I can quit that “fishy, fishy” routine. Finn it is from now on. Thank you for playing and thank you again for being there.  You really made a difference.


  1. Oh Patti! I am so sorry! I read your post about your dear friend. The post is very sad but a beautiful tribute to a friend who was very close to you.
    I missed reading your blog this weekend, otherwise I would have written earlier.
    In two days I will meet Dina who writes daily about Jerusalem. She lives not far from Jerusalem. So fortunately I read your story now, because I don't know if there is time to answer all comments these next two weeks.

  2. Having very recently lost our sister-in-law (although it was expected), I understand the sense of loss. Things get more 'normal' but you never forget someone who was a positive part of your life. (And that is a good thing.)

  3. There is also a third meaning to Finn, my Gary being Finnish would said that's the top meaning, congrats to the winner, a fine name indeed.

  4. Sorry to read about the loss of your friend, Patti. My father lived into his mid nineties and said the hardest part was the inevitable loss of so many near and dear friends...

  5. Oh damn I missed your last post. Things are not showing up in my reader for days sometimes. I'm so so sorry for your loss. What would we do without our blogging buddies at times like this?

    Finn ia great name, not as great as Elvis or course, but maybe less embarrassing to say anyway. :D

  6. I am glad you had the luncheon. That does help.

    Finn??? Funny!!!! The name reminds me of Huckleberry Finn also. I wonderful book I think.

  7. Patti, I did not read blogs over the weekend. I am so very sorry that your very good friend passed. You and her family are remembered in my prayers. Cherish all the fun times you had together.

  8. Finn is a cute name for a fish! Congrats, Suzanne.

  9. My three-year-old has a friend named Finn. What a cute name! Good choice. Hope you are feeling better today.

  10. I am glad to hear it is a bit easier for you today. Your heart will remain sore for a while as you remember your dear friend.
    Finn is a great name!

  11. An Irish fish name even though he is a Siamese Fighting Fish...see I remember these little details. Do you think he will know the difference? I kinda liked fishy fishy.


  12. Oh Patti, I am so sorry to read about the death of Joan. I remember you talking about her. I lost a really good friend last Summer --so I know what you are going through. God Bless You --and God Bless her family...

    We had a wonderful time in your state...

    P.S. Love the name, Finn... Cute name!!!

  13. Reader Wil,
    Thank you so much Wil. I am healing.
    I am so looking forward to your trip to meet Dina. I can't wait to see the pictures and know it will be a wonderful trip for you.

    Thanks Olga, looking forward to the more "normal" time. She will not be forgotten by me.

    Linda Starr,
    Hay, that works too. I'll think of Gary when I call Finn.

    Your Dad was so right. Truely the hardest part of aging is losing your friends and family.

    LLCool Joe,
    Thanks Joey. Blog buddies are the best.
    Maybe I should have drawn two names. Finn Elvis???

    Lets see, short for Finnigan, descriptive for long fins, Huckleberry, and Gary the Finnish fellow. Think all bases are covered. Thanks.

    Thank you so much and I definitely do cherish the time Joan and I had as friends.

    I thought so too. Luck of the draw.

    Mom of 12,
    I am a bit better, thank you so much. I also know a youngster named Finn.

    Thank you and I know the pain will be here for quite a while. Hopefully soon I will be able to smile at her memory.

    Well since I adopted him and I am half Irish, it isn't too far fetched. He really will come to any name as long as food is involved.

    I remember that and felt so badly for you at the time. Family we are born into and naturally love, friends we chose.
    Glad you salvaged a good visit after the high winds.

  14. I have not been online for a few days, so had to go back to read your post.
    I am so sorry. I remember the feeling of loss at a sudden death....I realized that "heartache" is a literal description of the feeling, and that "waves of grief" is also an apt description. I am sure you will have a time of great difficulty. We will be here for you through it all. I am so sorry for your loss of a special friend. Take care of yourself!

  15. Patti,

    Well, your Marlins are off to a very good start.

    They beat the St Louis Cardinals today at Roger Dean.

    Hurrah for your side!

  16. My dear Patti---Thanks for your concern. Right after I posted about The Peacocks...(Well, maybe an hour later) I could NOT get on The Net!! I tried everything you are supposed to do and had No Luck....So....I had to wait for my Computer Wizard, who came this afternoon and FIXED IT!!!! Hooray!
    So, I had no Internet from about 1AM Saturday morning till late this afternoon (Monday)...! Crazy Making, but not anything to go crazy

    I truly do know how you feel my dear...And it will get better, but it might take a while...I'm still struggling with two losses that really left me "empty", as you so perfectly stated...Missing these dear dear people---it leaves you bereft and spent in a way that there are no words for---Sleep has never been an escape for me at all--And Napping was not even in my understanding....Lots and Lots of Naps have been happening because I am so tired from what these losses have done to me and my body....So, be good to yourself, my dear. Pamper yourself and do whatever makes you feel good!!! I am so very sorry you are going through this pain, my dear Patti.

    "FINN"...How perfect is that? Love It!

  17. NC Mountain woman,
    Thank you so much. Your understanding is a true comfort.

    Thank you for being there. Knowing that does make all this bearable.

    Lucky you to have seen them. I did hear it on the radio and loved Greg Dobbs day. He was one of my fav's last year. I am so glad we resigned him. As of right now, we lead the division:))

    I was afraid some rotton bug had gotten you down and I am so glad (selfishly) that it was computer problems. Those can be maddening.
    I knew you would understand the loss and pain as you have had your heart pummeled in the past year.
    May we both heal.

  18. I am so sorry to read about the loss of your dear friend Joan. I pray that wonderful precious memory's of joyful times together will bring you comfort. To have a friend like Joan is a blessing.

  19. Hi Patti, love the name Finn!

    I am glad that you are beginning to feel a bit better. I am so sorry; things like this hurt really bad, but it helps so much when others reach out to help us.

    Here is a huge hug from Oregon ...

    Kathy M.

  20. Finn is a perfectly fantabulous fishy name!

  21. Dee,
    Thank you and I do realize just what a great friend I had. I was very lucky for 20 years and am grateful for that.

    Thank you so much, you hug was warm and welcome.
    I am so very sorry you also are suffering right now with loss.
    Sending a hug back at you.

    Southwest Arkie,
    I thought it fit him but there were so many good suggestions, I just couldn't go wrong.

  22. What a perfect name ...and I am glad things are easing ...I know its a long road to travel. xx

  23. A great Betta/Irish name! Keep your chin up, Patti!

  24. Dear Patti,
    I'm new to your blog, but I did read your posting about the death of your friend Joan. In 1989, when the cat with whom I lived 17 1/2 years died, she gave me a book about our relationship. The first words she channeled through me were the following. I hope they help you.

    "At the end, all that matters is love, my love for my human and hers for me. I have planted the memories of our life together in her heart. She will find them there when I am gone, and they will comfort her."

    You have so many wonderful memories of your friend Joan. May those memories comfort you. At the end, all that matters is your love for one another.


  25. Oh Patti honey I am so very sorry to hear about the loss of your very dear friend. Please know I am praying for you and her family.
    She would love the sweet tribute you wrote of her. I know the loss is deep and hurting you.
    Wish I had been over here sooner but just found out why my son is sick and the diagnosis was not good news.Since he reads my blog I can't really talk about it.
    Hang in there my friend and
    I love the name Finn

  26. Angie,
    Thanks so much. All the names were great but Finn really does fit.
    It is a long road but it is nice having support. Thanks.

    He does answer to it though I am pretty sure if I said "come here you S.O.B", he would be right there for the food.
    Yes, the chin is up thanks to all my blog buddies and a sturdy half English heritage.

    Thank you. Those are very wise words and hopefully soon those memories will bring smiles of comfort.

    Grandma Yellow Hair,
    Aww, Maggie, I am so very sorry that he is not doing well. I was so hopeful he had passed the worst. Please know I am praying for you both and all the family for the strength to conquer this set back.

  27. Good morning sweet Patti, first I want to thank you for stopping by and commenting on Chancy's blog. Your visits always make us happy. We have been out of pocket and not online much of late so we are trying to catch up now. We are so happy you had loving, caring people to help you start feeling some better after hearing of the loss of your friend. We like the name Finn for your little blue fish. We hope he brings you much pleasure. Hugs and nose kisses for you all from all of us!

  28. I'm so sorry about the loss of your friend. I've been away from blogger and haven't read that post yet.

  29. Again, I am so sorry about the loss of your friend, but am also thankful that others reached out to you in your time of sorrow with phone calls.

    I love the name of the fish. Brilliant!

  30. "The New Sixty" has been included in this weeks Sites To See. I hope this helps to attract many new visitors here.

  31. I hope you are recovering from your grief and enjoying Finn. That's a perfect name!

  32. chancy,
    Thank you so much for your words of comfort. You are right, caring friends make even the worst pain bearable.

    Amber Star,
    Thank you so much for the hug and caring. I just hope you are all right and will be posting soon.

    Retired English Teacher,
    Thank you again. You are living with your own pain and I so appreciate your reaching out.

    Jerry E Beuterbaugh,
    Wow, thank you so much Jerry for such an honor. I am hugely flattered. I will check your site out now.

    Thanks Judy, I am making progress. I thought it was a fortuitous pull out of the bowl also.