Monday, April 29, 2013


First off I want to thank each of you who stopped by my last post for your kind comments and for visiting Jules Etsy site. She got so many hits and even a sale.  You made my and her day. You are the best. Thank you so much. 

                      A WIFE FOR THE NIGHT

Some people live a little closer to the edge than I do and maybe have just a little bit more fun. I am not an overly cautious person, but Paula definitely had more moxie than I, especially the current version of  "I".

Paula came to work at our exit on the turnpike in Florida as a toll collector.  She was a young divorcee, attractive and a tad on the tough side. She was a bit of a wild child.  

Now all of us , even the semi-retired old ladies like me, were flirted with daily.  Regular customers like truckers, business men, traveling salesmen were often playful in our brief interactions. 

We were sort of a monotony break for the travelers.   Sometime when traffic was slow, a few pursued us  more seriously. It was generally fun and harmless. I enjoyed the gray haired set.   

Paula was popular on my shift. Usually she flirted openly but rarely followed through.  One slow night, a really handsome young fellow in a yellow Corvette came through and after a brief flirt, told Paula that he was looking for a "wife for the night" and wanted her to meet him at the service plaza after her shift ended in about half an hour for a meal and "what ever". 

We had to admit that this was a unique  pick up line that purely laid out his intentions.   We were surprised when Paula decided to meet him for dinner. We tried to caution her by saying she knew nothing about the fellow and reminding her that even serial killer Ted Bundy was a good looking, harmless looking lad. 

Ted Bundy. Sadly I would have trusted that face. 

Regardless, after shift, she took off down the turnpike. I was a bit concerned but she swore she would be OK. I tried to remember I was young once and the plaza was a crowded place.

The next day, I was relieved to see Paula arrive for work. I couldn't wait to hear how her "date" went.

She got the giggles and told me she gave him exactly what he had asked for.  They had dinner and coffee and the whole time, she critiqued his table manners, lack of ambition, speech and even his clothes.  

No idea of origin. It came to me in an email and I have been waiting for a chance to use it.    
Basically, she nagged him. She became a wife from Hell for the night or at least for an hour of it. She said from the minute he made his strange request, the plan to nag him was born. 

He wanted a wife so she made sure he got the worst kind of one. She nagged for the whole meal then  started complaining of a phantom headache.  He quickly baled. Paula had a great fun and enjoyed a full belly. 

That was not at all the kind of "wife"  the young fellow was looking for and I am sure he did some work on that pick up line. 

Sums up the old precaution, "be careful what you ask for".

               WHEN MY WISH WENT AWRY 

One day long ago, my boss and I were taking a co-worker home who was really sick and should never have tried to come to work.  He drove her in his car and I drove hers.  

As I was handling her germy steering wheel, I was a bit envious of her getting the time off--even though she was sick.  I had over partied the night before and thought of propping up on the couch surrounded by pillows, sipping Gator Aid and watching soap operas on TV sounded pretty good. I silently wished for such a nice restful day. 

Low and behold, by the next day, both my boss and I were proud owners of her disgusting "green death" type of flu. It was horrid.  Lesson learned about not thinking out what I wished for.   

Have you ever regrettably  gotten exactly what you wished for?  


  1. Hahaha... Next time "the wife for a night guy" will state exactly what he wants, I'm sure.

    I got what I asked for but it usually comes way too late and by that time I no longer want it and I'm then eternally grateful that I didn't get it when I THOUGHT I wanted it.

  2. Ha ha great stories! I can't think of anything I've wished for and then got and wished I hadn't.

    Oh yes I can. When I did Graphic design work and I had to quote on a job and I got it rather than someone else, and the whole job was a nightmare from start to finish!

  3. Great story! Yours are the best.

    Yes, when I was hired to manage a shop that I quickly discovered had been totally misrepresented to me and was on the skids.

  4. Great stories, Patti. Although the second also illustrates that "no good deed goes unpunished."

  5. Mmmm. Well I've often asked myself for things I shouldn't have or don't really need ... and am often disappointed when I get them. :)

  6. Paula really put one over on that! Frankly, I think she was lucky he didn't turn out to be an angry guy....!

    Off hand, I cannot think of anything that I asked for and was then sorry I got....

  7. Sheesh! Lucky the guy didn't squeeze her neck to death. That has happened to some wives!

  8. Great stories, Patti! I'm glad to hear Romeo baled instead of getting mad and turning out to be a Ted Bundy. She took a huge chance with that one.
    Can't think of anything at the moment that I was sorry to get, but I'm sure there must have been something!

  9. Ooh what a fun story. Yes! there have many cases, in my life, of getting what I asked for. Learned, early on to use caution and be more specific. hahaha

  10. Cute...cute...cute....must have been before the "Sun Pass"

  11. super great story....wife for the night..yep takes on a different meaning with her approach.
    Yes, I wanted so badly to hurt the love of my life when he dumped me. He had said to me I could date anyone except Mac. So I dated Mac on purpose, although he wasn't exactly my type. Well long story short, I married Mac. Worst mistake of my life, and it was all because I wanted revenge on another. Silly youth. Best mistake I ever made was running off with my husband of 40+ years, when everyone cautioned me not too....could we all say impetuous me?????? Oma Linda

  12. Two fantastic stories ....thanks for sharing and lifting my spirits after my water tank in the loft flooded !!!
    Its sorted now...thanks to a plumbing insurance I have but it was a shock to see the water dripping through the ceiling this morning.xx

  13. "Wife for a night" is a very funny story. Love it!

  14. Well they always say be careful what you wish for don't they? :)

  15. Paula did exactly what I would have done when I was young.

  16. HA HA HA --- A WIFE for the NIGHT, huh???? Your friend did GREAT... I loved it. He deserved that one!!!! Bet he was careful who he 'picked up' the next time......

    Yes---I'm sure we all regret some of the decisions we make through the years, and gotten EXACTLY what we have asked for.. That's just life I guess.. Hopefully, we learn from those experiences. My biggest one was marrying my first husband... GADS! ha


  17. Priceless story of the creative Paula.

  18. Yes, I fear I have indeed gotten what I asked for. But I learned a little every time.

  19. This really is a great story. I love how your co-worker turned this request into a "reality" encounter! She was so clever and very smart. The guy deserved it, and he probably needed it too.

    Yes, I've gotten what I asked for and regretted it. I think most of us do. We should just learn to be satisfied a bit more often instead of thinking the grass looks greener on the other side.

  20. There are very few tollways in NZ so we don't have so many opportunites to drive and flirt!! I had never realised that there was such an attractive upside for paying for using a road! Delightful to read of Paula's nagging ways! Pxx

  21. had me worried for a bit but that was a great way to treat the "wife hunter". I wonder if it changed his atitude but I doubt it.

  22. Manzi,
    I am sure he worked on his pick up line.
    Oddly, I totally understood your statement.

    LLCool Joe,
    Thanks Joey and that had to have been awful. Hope it paid really well.

    Thank you and I am glad you think so. That had to have been a huge disappointment.

    Thanks. Actually that exact thought went through my mind as I awoke to fever and aching body.

    Me too and I really hate it when what I wanted was expensive.

    Ha, I think he was just too shocked to be angry. Lucky you to have escaped unscathed.

    Probably if the "date" had lasted longer he might have.

    I use to think I could spot a nut job but Bundy proved me wrong. Sure glad he was just stupid, not vicious.

    You nailed it. Being specific really is important.

    BlueRidge Boomer,
    We did have Sun Pass but only in one lane and it was both cash and pass. I see you have toured the turnpike in Fla.

    Linda Wildenstein,
    Ouch, that had to hurt but luckily, the right one did come along. Twas meant to be.

    Thank you. Oh my, what an awful thing to happen. So glad you have insurance but still, you have the mess and misery to go through. Hope all is well again soon.

    Thanks, we had fun with it at the time.

    Shoot, "be careful what you wish for" was supposed to be my title today but I forgot to change it when I added on. I will change it for tomorrow. Thanks.

    After reading about your life in America, I do believe you would have. In my younger days, I would have had the moxie but probably wouldn't have thought of it.

    Since you had to go through what you did to put you in George's path, it was probably worth it. He really is a keeper.

    Thank you. Creative is definitely what she was.

    Learning is the only saving grace in those instances. I hope I also learned.

    I am also guilty of the ole green grass fault on occasion though much less so as I age.
    I kind of wonder if he changed or was just more specific in his future dealings.

    You need to check out those toll roads but only if you take Laura with you. We basically did it to make a boring job more fun.

    I would like to think he changed his ways but he probably only changed his pick up line.

  23. Oh Patti, I LOVED that story about the "wife for a night." He got just what he asked for, didn't he? I have asked for things I thought I wanted many times, and they almost always turn out to be the wrong thing. Like my first three husbands. :-)

  24. Paula is my new HERO!!!! I love a woman with a quirky sense of humor ;-) I am on your side though that she was a bit careless, but like you said, we were all young.
    I am always very careful about what I ask for now... It came to me when I was a teenager and I was really in love with this boy who had sort of dumped me. I remember being so sad and wanting to see him again, even if just "one more time." That's exactly what I got...

  25. Well, he got exactly what he deserved...but she was probably very lucky he wasn't some kind of bad guy.

  26. The Paula story is hilarious! I thought you said you were running out of stories...!

  27. That is Ted Bundy??? I have heard he "looked" safe but if I ever saw his photo in the past I blocked it out. WOW!!!

    Your friend is funny. I never would have done that.

    In the past, I would plan to call in sick on a certain day as I never ever used my sick days. Every time I thought that, I really got sick. My body refused to let me lie.

  28. So that is what Ted Bundy looks like...I have heard that saying so many times and never knew. He does look like someone you could trust. That is pretty funny what your friend did, though it was risky. Don't recall ever thinking to be more careful what I wish for. It is the "never say never" that gets me into trouble.
    Again, thanks to everyone for checking out our Etsy shop and for all the wonderful comments! Much needed praise when you are starting a new business. Thank you too, Patti! You are the best!

  29. Hilarious, good for Paula!

    I can't think of anything, though I'm sure there has been a time or two.

  30. I just dropped back to say I had never heard of them but I have looked it up ....sounds brilliant. The GKids and I would love it ....not sure about Jay and Vicki can I justify the £55 ??? Is it really good ...with no problems??? ...I have such a sweet tooth that it might just be the answer.Thanks for that ...I am so tempted xx

  31. Djan,
    Yikes, sure glad you didn't give up. Think you have a winner now.

    Introverted Art.
    Ha, me too. We are so super human when we are young.
    Sounds like that was not a good thing.

    The young never think of those things. They think they are bullet proof. I kind of remember.

    Mary Lee,
    Thankfully, things I read or things people say remind me of a story. Nothing comes from the top of my head anymore.

    I am glad he happened on the scene for he really embedded in me the fact that nut jobs do not always look the part.
    Funny about your body keeping you from fibbing.

    He really put a new image out there for the serial killer. You just can't tell by looks.
    You are more than welcome and I know your business will be a success. Your product is great.

    My thoughts exactly. Hopefully that means that you escaped getting smacked by a wayward wish.

    I love mine and have had no problems. Some of the good stuff stays inside but it is easy enough to get to. They are $49.00 here.

  32. So glad to hear that was the kind of wife she became!

  33. Dear Arkansas Patti, so good to read your stories once again. I've been away from reading blogs for nearly three weeks because of a minor ailment and I've missed your great, good common sense.

    Like you, I wouldn't have taken that traveler up on his invitation. But Paula certainly turned the tables on him!

    As to wishing for something and then regretting it, that has happened with my move here to Missouri. I'm trying to find the good in all this and hopefully one day, I'll understand just why I'm here!

    I left a comment on your last posting about your friend the jeweler. I do so hope you know the answer to my question. Peace.

  34. what a hoot a wife for a night, there was more than met the eye with Paula.

  35. Snowing in Arkansas in May? Amazing! Did you get any?

  36. Patti you tell such great stories! I am glad this one had a funny ending it could of been bad for Paula taking such a risk but when we are young we don't think much of that do we?
    He probably still today thinks of that temporary wife and wonders who she is nagging today.
    Hope you are well and that your enjoying the weekend.
    The winds are so high I have been inside most of today.
    So glad I came by tonight.

  37. Can’t think of the last time a wish of mine backfired, but I'm pretty careful what I wish for. Did get picked up once by a young minister when a friend and I were hitch hiking to a coffee house at the Jersey shore. He was so worried about us he came back at an appointed time and took us home. (Don't tell my Grands this story!)

  38. Hmmm... I can't rightly think of a situation where I got what I wished for and didn't like it, but then again I have a poor memory which is good for situations like this.

    That was really rather a reckless situation she put herself in. If I was her mother, it would scare me silly.

  39. Glad all worked out with the dinner and your friend with the guy. He could have been a guy that was not so nice.

    Sorry that you got sick after doing a going deed. Hugs for you and nose kisses for Mighty from us.