ON A ROLL

I have posted about this before but even though I know it is true, I still get surprised when in happens. Bad things come in threes but so do good things which was once again proven to me. 

#1.  Don't know if I mentioned that I was having some tummy problems. Food turned to gas which makes mixing in polite society a struggle. Mostly burping but a little of the stuff sometimes escaped from another orifice. TMI (too much information) ?? I would get relief in minutes by chewing on a small piece of candied ginger. Amazing stuff.

When I was consulting the Net, ginger tea was highly touted so I gave it a try. Wow, one cup in the morning and I was good for the whole day.  I am not a doctor but if you have similar problems, give it a shot.  Though be warned that it is a blood thinner so if you are on those, you might need to make  adjustments to your meds. Check with your doctor. That was Monday. 

#2     Wednesday I was going to town to pick up a prescription when my little truck hesitated, then two lights lit up on my dash.  ABS (brakes)  lit up and the image of a battery did at the same time. I was driving past my mechanic so I pulled in. He popped my hood and said my alternator belt was shredded. He knows my little Toyota is almost 20 years old and said I would need all three belts. 

Oh joy, fat chance this was a quick fix but I did say a string of good things happened. He made a call and within 10 minutes, my three replacement belts arrived. I know people with brand new cars waiting weeks for parts.  He put his mechanic right on it and in 30 minutes, I was good to go--if a bit lighter in the wallet. 

I was so impressed. This could have happened when I was heading for another town and I could have been stranded on a remote, two lane hill country road. 

#3   I was really feeling blessed and thought if I heard about this from someone else, I'd suggest they should buy a lotto ticket while their luck was hot. So taking my own advice, on the way home I stopped in to get a scratch off ticket just for fun. 

I was delighted to learn the ticket made me $50 richer. Ok that is not a billion, a million or even a thousand but it really made my day. Fifty bucks--woo hoo. That took some of the sting out of the belt replacement. 

I would like to say the good things kept on rolling in but that was it. Still that made my week.

I am a big believer in the three good things for I had a similar day recently. Think I am on a roll.

Do you believe it is not only bad things that come in threes but good things also?

UNEXPECTED GIFTS

I wasn't looking for a gift but I got a whole day of them anyway.  It started when I saw my wheelbarrow tire was flat.  Aww, phooey. So I took it into town to see if I could get it repaired or at least replaced.  I went to the service station that kind of specializes in patching flat tires.

A  young fellow came out to get the tire out of the back of my pickup. While he was working on it we started talking.  He was asking about my ancient little truck. I told him it was a 2003 with 190,000 miles on it.  He asked if I wanted to sell it and I immediately said I was happy with it. It hasn't given me a bit of trouble in all these years.  He then shocked me saying he could get $9000 for it.  Yikes. Blue Book Value is only $2500.  That kind of gave me lift though knowing what I value  still has value.

He fixed my tire, put it in the back of my truck and I asked what I owed him. He looked quizzical for a moment then just smiled and said. "Nothing, this is on me." I was very pleased and am pretty sure I unintentionally played the "old lady card" again.

I was smiling as I drove to pick up my Lotto ticket on the way home.  Now it was a really windy day and my worst hair cut ever was doing its best to dance off my head.  Oddly when I got to the store and checked the door glass for the damages, I had to laugh. This was the best my hair had looked in months. Wind is evidently a great hairdresser.  So Mom Nature took pity on me and styled my hair for me. Now if I could only repeat the effect she got.

Then as I placed my order for my ticket, the young girl behind the counter gave me a nice compliment. Trust me, 83 year old women don't get many.  She said she really liked my hair and wanted to know  who did it.  I smiled as I told her that Mom Nature did. Then she surprised me further.  

"I have been meaning to tell you each time you come in," she said. I love that shade of lipstick you wear. Sure wish I could wear that color." It is coral.

Golly---free flat fixed, and compliments from a 20 year old girl. Pretty good day. 

But there was one more gift waiting.  I was having propane delivered that afternoon. It is a big truck and I have to open both of my 12 foot gates so he can get in. We had a nice chat and when he got ready to drive out, I said as I usually do, "I'll get the gate."

He then said, "No problem, I will get them," and he did. Doesn't sound like a big deal but it was really inconvenient for him to do it and I really appreciated it for as I mentioned, they are heavy. Could have been that "old lady card" again. Hey when we are young, we flirt --when we are old we use what works. 

Three lovely people in one day--yep things do come in threes--even good things. 

Ever lean on your age for a little special treatment?

THREE COOL THINGS

With all the negative media today, I am going to fill my post with only positives. It seems good things come in threes also.

I all ready told you about the neat power company lineman who bent the rules for me and sent a truck to pick up the pile of debris they created. They did not have to but they did and the second crew arrived right on schedule and did a great job cleaning up.
That was one.

Then as some of you know, I have wrestled with heart problems that were patched with a pacemaker and a stent.  Wanting to do what I could to help my heart, I went on a heart healthy diet and lost 42 pounds. Now if only the skin that surrounded those 42 pounds had somewhere else to go:)) Old skin just doesn't snap back like it use to.  Still I am happy with the results and improved numbers.

One thing I gave up with the diet change was bacon.   I never buy bacon for home use.  The one time I did, I ate the whole pound in one sitting. I have a friend whose son swears he wants to die with bacon on his breath. I guess if I knew for sure I was enjoying my last few days, that would be my wish also.  As I am a bacon-aholic, I only get it when eating out and for many months, not even then.

Anyway, I went to lunch with my support group and on the way I decided I was actually going to sin and have a BLT for lunch as Jo Jo's makes the best. I started to drool a little as I got near the restaurant.

"I'll have a BLT, no mayo." I proudly stated to the waitress. My friends grew wide eyed at my request as I had been so good for so long. They were shocked to see Patti happily falling off the wagon.

"Sorry, we are out of bacon." the waitress stated simply.

Huh???   No restaurant is ever "out" of bacon, especially a decent sized one, but this one evidently was. Everyone grinned and said that I really had someone watching over me to make a restaurant run out of bacon to save my ticker.  Yes I was disappointed but I was also relieved the bacon temptation had been totally removed.
That was two.

The final cool thing kept me up most of Friday night worrying. My 12 year old riding lawnmower had refused to work that day. It was a hard start, then it stuttered, lurched and missed badly only to belch a huge 10 x 10 foot cloud of white smoke bringing my neighbor running to the fence thinking explosion.

Fearing it was terminal I stewed about coming up with the money to get the old gal fixed or buy a new one. According to my fitness tracker, I got 3.5 hours sleep that night weighing my options.

I decided to trailer it to the dealer 40 miles away. He could either fix it or sell me a new one.  Sigh.

Hoping to drive it on the trailer instead of pushing, I tried to start it. It fought me and I fought back but eventually it started. Then to test it, I rode it a bit with the blade disengaged. Hum--ran good.  I engaged the blade which yesterday caused the huge smoke burp but hey, no burp and it still ran good. Happily I finished mowing my whole yard and it ran like a champ.

What ever power that can soften a workman's heart and make a restaurant run out of bacon can evidently fix lawnmowers too. Thank you, thank you and please stay with me. I thanked the big guy up there but unless he was looking for some easy fixes in our crazy world, pretty sure it was someone a bit farther down the ladder like a guardian angel. Was that you Dad?
Regardless of whom to credit, that was number three and a grateful me.

Have you ever had an unknown force make your life surprisingly better and erase a problem? Did you attribute it to luck, that you were just due or perhaps there really was someone unseen looking out for you?

THINGS THAT MADE MY WEEK

This is going to be an appreciation post. Often it is restoring to focus on all the good that has passed through your life almost unnoticed. Somehow, the bad gets the most publicity. Makes it hard to be bummed though when you give the good times their due. Sometimes it may be a visual or sensual thing that brings you pleasure, but most often it is the people. They can touch us with the most force, either good or bad. This is about the good.

Who will NOT be mentioned individually in this post are the wonderful blog friends I have visited with these past 9 months. They already know almost daily how much I appreciate them and enjoy our visits. We have shared our lives as if we shared a fence line. Blogging has taken me back to states I have visited before and enjoyed but also to states I probably will never get to see and now know that is a darn shame, for I am missing some wonderful sights and people.

Blogging has also taken me to countries around the world that I have always wanted to see, and now have a better knowledge of the far away landscapes, different cultures and the lovely people. Discovering that we are different only in small matters. In what counts, we are so much alike. This post however is not about the obvious everyday happy encounters on the Net. I want to share some of the blogs that I do not leave comments on but love to read. I will also share some of the simple things that made my week.

Foremost this week and every week, my very boon companions who live through my moods, enjoying my good ones and putting up with the not so good ones, totally making every day.




















Mighty Dog is once again Mighty. His leg has healed enough to chase a rabbit yesterday. That was a heart warming sight. My more laid back cats watching a little Hummer TV.



This week, one of my young neighbors made my day. He was promoting the annual grade school fund raiser. Sometimes these fund raisers offer coupons to local merchants in exchange for a few dollars. Sometimes they are for humongous chocolate bars which are never good for someone who is weight conscious. This time it was for a drawing for some really neat, nonfattening prizes.

He is smiling for he had just talked me out of five dollars. He and his older brother have been great neighbors since I came to Arkansas. If I want to leave town, I can rely on them to take care of my animals that must stay home. I have complete confidence in their abilities and reliability. That is a great comfort for an animal lover.

So when the annual "sales" come up, I participate with pleasure. Both boys have a talent for easy conversation. There is never the Old person/ Young person gap. Their parents and grandparents live across the street and I can only say, I got very lucky with my neighbors. His mother called to find out what where her boy was for he had stayed so long to chat. Cool kid. Most would take your money and run.

Now I want to give a brief shout out to the blogs that don't receive comments from me but I look forward to and consider treasures. These are read for selfish pleasure. Perhaps they will bring you pleasure.

Garrison Keillor whom I have mentioned before, is brilliant, funny and politically on the same page as I am. If you aren't liberal, you can skip this fellow. The man recently had a mild stroke and yes, he even found humor in that experience

Murderati is a writers blog. Published authors write a column each day. One I won't miss is Tess Gerritsen whose day to contribute is Tuesday. She lets you look into the life of a successful writer, warts and all. Truthfully, there is much there that is daunting. I very much like her books, "Gravity" being my favorite.

Citizen of the Month is an excellent writer. Sometimes I find sections of his writing about as soothing as sandpaper but most often, he is insightful and quite funny. His post on going to a Mets ballgame(Lets Go Mets) is prime example.

Another nice thing was a complete surprise. You know by now that I am besotted with my adopted town. Yesterday I got a copy of my favorite magazine, Mother Earth News, and found this tiny town was their selection as one of the "11 Great Places You've(Maybe)Never Heard Of." Great taste Mother.

Olkhdan,you may want to check out MEN for I believe your area was also selected. Now HGTV last December selected us as #3 out of ten of the best Christmas towns. For a town of under three thousand souls, I think we are doing well. Just to let you know that others also share my appreciation of this tiny town.

These are not all but they are some of the things that made my week. Don't want to ignore the surprise sunshiny days (they have been quite rare lately); the sweet smell of a rose that is clinging to the season; a breath taking view nicely scrubbed by the rains; watching migrating hummers squabble over the feeder; my sports teams winning or when not winning, at least playing well; satisfaction of a freshly mowed lawn between the rains; dinner with delightful friends; or phone calls from family and friends who make my day, just by being. It has been a GOOD week.

What made your week?

DID NOT SEE THAT COMING

 All the signs were there so  maybe I should have seen this coming but I didn't.  

I own some  gnarly looking hands. Prime suspects to be painful but strangely they weren't--till the other day when they lived up to the look. 

My hands suggest that maybe at one time I tried to  pull a fast one on the Mob and had been worked over by some goons. Actually, they are the result of being a klutzy athlete in my early years, then as a caretaker of livestock later on. My horse and the calves beat me up the most. 

However, gnarly looking or not, they have always been quite functional and mostly pain free, my right hand being the best. This week, my good hand slipped over to the dark side. Now it feels ugly also. So far only one finger on the right hand has caved to the pressure but I fear I am on a slippery slope. I brought this on myself.

Don't know if I mentioned it before but my property came with an all concrete, 12 by 16 foot, storm shelter. That metal roof just sits over the concrete one and it was put there at a much later date to match the house roof. 

 It is mostly underground and is over 101 years old according to the date carved in the wall. It has a few troublesome cracks in the concrete so I am not confident enough to use it as a tornado hidy hole. I have pretty much ignored it. However, this year I thought it might make a decent root cellar and since I have a bounty of produce needing stored this year, I decided to spruce it up and use it. 


The walls were down right nasty looking from over 100 years of neglect. So out came the scrub brushes and cans of paint.  Since I was going for cover up and not beauty, I decided to use up some of the left over  paint I had lying around. Thus, I have a white ceiling,floor, three white walls and one blaze orange one.  Everything took 2 coats.  

OK I missed some spots, some areas were too rough or broken to accept paint, my edges are terrible and I ran out of paint during the second coat of orange, but trust me, it does look cleaner. 

All the painting, especially the ceiling over my head took its toll on my body. I've had arthritis in my back and hips for about 15 years but it has been mostly manageable. Boy did I stir up a nest of hornets with the painting. My body protested mightily. It took nightly soaks in steaming hot Epson salts baths to remain mobile. Epson salts is a miracle worker by the way. I would wake up the next day just a little sore but once again ready to go.  

The morning after my final brush stroke, I woke up to a really angry, swollen,  super achy pointy finger on my right hand from gripping the roller and brush. Since it was my least deformed finger, it took me a bit to realize that it was having an arthritic flare up. Son of a gun!!   First time ever for that part of my body. My pinky gets briefly cranky when I mow but that is really a lesser finger and easy to work around. 

Seems the index finger does much more than just point. It handles a good chunk of the computer keyboard, controls the left side of the mouse, the fast forwarding button on the remote. opens soda and dog food cans, guides a knife, works scissors,removes lids and is really handy when blowing your nose,washing your ears or wiping. Who knew??

Our opposable  thumbs may have moved us up and away from the other beasts but it could not have done that with out the index finger's help but it never gets a mention.  A very underrated digit.  

So as with all things age related, I curse-- then adapt. It is ALL better now and that next finger in line has learned some cool new stuff.  The second runner up finger is still a bit awkward but it is trying. It just needed training.

While I am at it, I probably should work on training my left arm and hand to actually do things also.  Out side of a support role, that appendage has always been pretty useless and uncoordinated. It is more or less there just for decoration and to give an allusion of symmetry. Time I put it to work for it never hurts to have backup. 

I did discover a useful tool to help the finger pain. I realized heat helps but I didn't want to be tied to a bowl of hot water. I had things to do. So I broke out a winter favorite that I keep on hand.  They are called Hot Hands and can be bought at Walmart or any hunting supply store. Most hunters or outdoor sorts all ready know about them. 

They are inexpensive, air activated, disposable hand warmers that really work. I normally use them here in Arkansas when hiking in the snow. I slip one inside my gloves and have warm hands on the coldest days. They are also a staple in my winter emergency kit that I keep in my vehicle.

These really gave my poor ole sore finger relief and actually reduced the swelling. I would wrap it around my achy knuckles or just hold it in my hand. They do make larger ones that might work even better.  I could put it down, take care of business and come back an hour or so later and the warmth would crank right back up with just a little shaking of the bag. It is quite reliable and portable. Hope this discovery might help someone with a similar problem of achy hands or maybe just cold ones come winter. 

Do you have tried and true, non-pill methods to combat or prevent arthritic flare ups or are you blessed with the supple hands of a youngster.  

PS, That cantaloupe is still hanging in the tree. 

FORBIDDEN RICE

If you are like me, when you hear the word, "forbidden”, it immediately sparks the curiosity gene and I need to know the "whys." Of course if "forbidden” is against the law, I am quite compliant. I have never felt laws were designed to irritate me or restrict me but to protect me and others from me.

I was mostly raised with the parental commands of “we don't want you to, we'd rather you didn't, and you are stupid if you do.” I don't ever recall the term “forbidden” being used in my family. Forbidden seems to come under the “apple in the Garden of Eden,” category. I mean, that is a huge word.

Recently on Dr. Oz and also on morning news programs, the term “forbidden” kept coming up. It was attached to a bag of rice. Forbidden Rice was so named in ancient China as the rice that was only to be eaten by the Emperor, thus it was forbidden to the masses.

What science has discovered is that this is not only a very superior rice, it has amazing nutritional values. It is black in color and turns deep purple when cooked. Its dark purple color is primarily due to its high anthocyanin content which has powerful antioxidant properties. It has a relatively high mineral content (including iron) and, like most rice, supplies several important amino acids.

According to a study presented by the American Chemical Society, “one spoonful of black rice bran contains more anthocyanin antioxidants than a spoonful of blueberries and better yet, black rice offers more fiber and vitamin E antioxidants, but less sugar." The rice contains more vitamin B, niacin, vitamin E, calcium, magnesium, iron, and zinc than white rice. Wow, a miracle food.

Reading all this pretty much convinced me it must be blah tasting. Tofu comes to mind. Usually anything that good for you is not as appealing as say, good ole comfort food. But I do have a curious nature and decided to try. What could it hurt? Besides, I did make a resolution to make better food choices.

You won't find this at Walmart or even most grocery stores. Health food stores or the Internet are your best bet. A friend picked up mine for me on her away trip from this tiny town (thanks Jules). Then it sat in my cupboard untouched. New Years day came along with the "clean slate-- try new things and the wish to improve food choices.” So out of the cupboard it came.

Dry, it slightly resembles rat poop. Cooked, it is a dead ringer for that disgusting dropping. I looked at it and was really feeling a thick blockage in my throat. I couldn't help but think this was some kind of sick joke.

Perhaps a clever soul had figured a way to actually package rat poop and tout it as a health food. Trying to convince my closed throat that this was not the case and not wanting to be wasteful, I decided that maybe doctoring it up would erase that image. I still hadn't tasted it.

So I chopped some scallions to add to the black pellets and the bright green did help somewhat. I also like fruit in most everything so I threw in some dried cranberries. Well the red hardly showed up in all the blackish purple. The computer suggested roasted sweet potatoes or mango additions but I had no mango and the rice was really losing its heat so RSP were out.

Looking around for more help I decided to add some sunflower seeds and I sauteed them quickly in olive oil to put on top of my growing dish. Finally, I drizzled just a tad of the warm olive oil over the concoction and sprinkled a little sea salt over the growing pile of food.

The kitchen sink was attached so I decided, this was all I was going to do. Pushing the rat poop image out of my mind, I took my first bite. Mercy, it was WONDERFUL. This has such a unique, nutty taste. It was something new and delightful to my happy taste buds.

I had made enough to use as a side dish for three meals but I ate all but a handful in one sitting. It became my whole meal. Meat was not even considered. I can only say that if you want to try something delightfully delicious and want to improve your health at the same time, try Forbidden Rice. This is so good, I would serve it to company that I wanted to impress.

One surprise benefit. Being full of fiber, it served two functions. It really "got things moving" the next day and oddly, I was full on a relatively small amount and remained full for the rest of the day.

Possibly a diet food?? Who knows. Anyway, if you can get past the rat poop image, give it a shot. Eat it plain or add your own goodies to it. It doesn't reheat well so I suggest only making what you intend to eat at one meal.

BON APPETIT

THE WEEK THAT WAS

It is not unusual for things to go awry in our lives. Usually we learn a bit and just go on. However it is when we pay good money for the event and it affects what little vanity old age lets us keep, that makes it a bit harder to just grin and bear it. 

Some of you know I have been nursing a sore shoulder since a January spill I took on some ice. I am much better but still not totally functional.  Combing my hair is still a painful process to be avoided.  So as my former perm died and my hair was in desperate need of a cut, I was forced to seek help. My street person look was getting too realistic. So instead of cutting my own hair and giving myself a 5 dollar perm as I normally would, I hired out the job.

A lot of beauticians employ the trick of not letting the customer see what they are doing. They position the chair so our back is to the mirror and talk a lot to distract us. I can understand the reasoning. 

This girl had done just that and when she was down to about 4 rollers left to position, she swung me around to see.  Mercy, she had used more curlers on a third of my head than I use on my whole head.  Well I thought, this perm should last a while. 

When the curlers were removed, I was a bit stunned.  I was uber kinky, and not in a fun way. There was one real possibility in my future. I could definitely apply to clown school. Where did I put that red nose and huge shoes from my high school days as a clown?  
  

Not me or my picture. I didn't have the stomach to take an actual photo. Even old gals have pride.

Ok, that picture is a mild exaggeration but my hair really was out of control. It seemingly had grown an incredible three extra inches, had flared out in all directions and was perfectly frizzy. The image made me chuckle, till I realized, 'Oh crap, that's me.' 

Did my beautician act alarmed or at least a bit sheepish?? Nope. She not only did not try to comb it out or style it--she just shoved me under a dryer and then quickly out the door after making sure no one would see me exit her shop. I was surprised I didn't get the back door treatment. 

I was several inches taller and 75 bucks lighter. Actually, had this happened when my face was all puffy a while back, I could have gone on a 5 county crime spree and no one would know who I was. 

I wasn't too alarmed and was thinking surely I could tame the mess somehow once I got home.  However hours of painful manipulating with a bum arm did nothing but make it seem to grow bushier and set my shoulder recovery back a good month.

I buried my pride and went to lunch with some friends two days later. It was too early in the perm to do anything but wash and pray.  I did meet them for the meal but only after I had wrapped it tightly in a scarf for hours to smush it down before lunch. All through lunch, I could feel it slowly springing back to its original state. Feeling your hair literally growing on your head is a wee bit disconcerting.  

My head no longer found rest but remained several inches above what ever I laid it on. I was pretty sure if dropped on my head I would just bounce. The texture was very similar to steel wool and I was thinking it might take tin snips to cut it. After struggling for a week trying to regain control, I could take no more. I needed professional help.

I was not willing to let that original cold hearted beautician tackle the mess even though she owed me. So I desperately hunted for a beautician that could take me in RIGHT NOW. I needed help and I found it.  Maybe I should have taken this beautician's instant availability as a warning but I was desperate. What could she possibly do to make it worse? Push come to shove, I would just have her shave it all off and start from scratch.

The new salon was totally empty except for one beautician, usually not a positive sign. She was a  middle aged, very thin woman whose own hair was in dire need of a make over. I tried to console myself  that often the best beauticians and mechanics seldom had great looking hair or good running cars as they were too busy to work on their own.  I didn't hesitate to settle in the chair for I was desperate and there was always the shaved-head solution to fall back on.

However, my luck really improved. She turned out to be quite pleasant, very quick and thankfully talented. In just a few moments, she had deftly lowered my wild hair, clipped off the frizz, shaped the cut and gave me back a modicum of pride. Finally I could go out in public again, hold my head up and be recognized by friends. My budding career as a criminal or a clown was over before it got started. Life was good. 

  Am I still very curly?? You bet, but the kink has softened enormously and my head no longer bounces off the pillow. I miss my little bangs to hide my high forehead but I am Ok. My hair grows very quickly so hope is back that in a few weeks or so, all will be be back to normal once again. I can do this. Now when I wake up, I can shake my head, run my fingers through the really short curls and I am good to go. The no pain from useless brushing is a lovely gain.   

Have you ever had a disaster at the hairdressers or barber shop?? Would you have immediately demanded satisfaction from the original beautician or would you have done like I did to crawl meekly off with a silent vow of never to  cross that threshold again? 

ONE MOO LEFT

I was quite comfortable.  Warm from my bath, bed soft with fresh sheets, a good book to read, and we had a new president. Life is good. I was just ready to start reading when the sound seemed to come from right outside my window.

MOOOOOOOOOO.  Ok, I have been around enough cows to recognise a semi- distress call but ignored it and dug deeper into my book.   MOOOOOOOO it came again with a little squeak at the end. 

Hum I thought, it could be one of three things.  Either her calf is sick, been taken from her or there is a predator out there alarming her.

She was part of my neighbor's small herd of about 30 cows. His pasture butts right up to my fence in my backyard, not 100 feet from my bedroom. Sometimes the sound moved and seemed to get closer. I was afraid she might have torn down my fence and was in my yard. 

Recently a friend of a dear friend of mine had been killed trying to shoo a neighbor's bull from her yard. She had been my age.  That thought kept me from getting dressed and dashing outside as a younger me might have. She kept up the regular, incessant mooing  as I tried to read.

Then a cow on the other side of the highway decided to join in.  I now had mooing in stereo. These were not gentle moos folks but bellows.

I got brave enough to grab a flashlight to stand in the doorway to see what was there. Another neighbor had told me the day before that he was hearing coyotes at night.  I thought that might be the problem. I heard nothing but the cow and in fact, couldn't even see her with the strong flashlight and no flashing eyes of a predator.

Ok Patti, you can't solve this so go to bed. I'd like to say it ended eventually and I got a good night's sleep but she kept it up ALL night, still going strong at 2 AM. What a set of lungs on her.

In the morning, bleary from lack of sleep, I looked but the herd was out of sight and nowhere near my property.  There was no dead calf nor did I find coyote tracks. Ok I had no idea what they would look like but there were no tracks of any kind.

Talked with a neighbor and she said she was sure that the cows had been separated from their calves which explained the all night serenade.  But why was only one mother upset. Mystery.

Next night I am again snuggled in bed when I heard it. MOOOOOOOO.  Oh crap, not again!!!  I waited on tender hooks for the next Moo but it thankfully never came. She just had one Moo left in her she had to get out.

Ah, country life.  Aren't you glad now if you live in the city?

A KNIFE TO CUT THE PAIN

At my luncheon with the girls this week, we were discussing old wives tales and superstitions when "J" told one I hadn't heard before that cracked me up.

"Put a knife under the bed to cut the pain of childbirth."

After I quit giggling, this got me thinking about old wives tales  which I have always enjoyed. I mean, these sage women did become "old " wives after all.  If these were "young" wives tales, who would listen?

Here are some I remember or found. Most came from my grandmother who was a delightful old wife. 

1.   If you are unable to fall asleep, you are awake in someone else's dreams. 
I kind of like that thought. Sure hope I am having fun. 

2.   If you see a rainbow and make a wish while touching gold, it will come true.
Dang, I never have gold handy. 

3.   What you give on Friday, you will never get back.
For some things I'd really like to give that one a try. Like a cold to someone I am not particularly fond of. 

4.  If a woman has a longer second toe, she will dominate her husband. 
So that's why I am such a wuss.

5.   If a bird poops on you it will bring you good luck.
My grandmother had this happen so it might have been her way to put a good spin on a yucky event.

5.   If you laugh too much at night before bed, you will wake up crying.
I have found that it just makes me sleep much better and I wake up refreshed. 

6.   Moles on the neck means money by the peck. 
Think my mom made that up to make my moley necked brother feel better. However, he has done well.

7.   Three people on a journey is bad luck. Carry a stone as the fourth. 
Again one my  grandmother thought gospel. I have such a journey coming up. Where did I put that stone?

8.   Drop a fork, company is coming. 
I have found when bored that deliberately dropping one does not work. 

9.   Clothes worn inside out will bring good luck.
I console myself with that one when I get back from town and finally notice the error. It takes the sting out of being stupid. 

10. Going out in the cold with wet hair will make you sick.
Science says NO!  I say-- every time!!

11. Rub Menthol on the souls of your feet at night to stop a cough. 
I keep forgetting to try that one as I so rarely get sick. Probably because I don't go out in the cold with a wet head anymore. 

12. When you feel a shiver, someone is stepping on your grave. 
Planning a burial at sea would eliminate all shivers. 

13. If a cat washes behind its ears, rain is coming. 
Minnie just did that and rain is predicted for today. Think all weather men should own a cat.

14. If you say "rabbit, rabbit" the first thing when you wake up in the morning on the first of each month it will bring you good luck for the rest of the month.  
I just keep forgetting. Maybe for the first day in December??

15,  Tie a handkerchief to your wrist during a hurricane for safety.
This deserves explanation. My grandmother told  a tall tale of a terrible storm long ago in Key West.  As the waters surged up to a woman's house, the mistress, who had left the swamped home with her housekeeper, turned to the unfortunate servant and demanded she to back into the house to retrieve her heirloom hanky. The servant did so  and as the house slipped out to sea, the housekeeper was seen standing on the porch, waving the hanky. 

Those are some I have heard of. Do you have a favorite tale or superstition that has been handed down in your family or that some wise old wife told you??

GOOD FOR THE SOUL

Oh my, it has been wonderful. If you haven't done a hiatus from blogging, you should try it. Just pull the cord on your computer and look around you. There is actually a world that doesn't glow.


The daily blog left me with a constant scratching for a new idea then searching for the words to frame and flesh out the idea. Often as not, when I first started, the words just came. Then I burned out after 211 posts and about 84,000 words. My friend, the written word, left me, which is why the hiatus.


At first, I was a bit lost though definitely more relaxed. It took a while for me to quit thinking about tomorrow's post, till I finally realized, there was no "tomorrow's post. I really wanted to visit my blog list as I saw new posts arriving but I knew if I did, I would be lured back into writing. This was cold turkey. I truly missed you all.







The weeds were first on my list. Here is a picture of the first load of horse weeds that graced my fence line along the road. They were taller than I, but fortunately did not have a good a root system. I was able to up root them but they did produce my first set of sore muscles. My coral honeysuckle are showing appreciation now for at last having room to breathe. The picture proved I still hadn't gotten over looking at things as being a possible post. That would come.

Mighty and I have taken long walks in the National Forest recreation areas. I still have to keep him on level ground and on a leash (we have over a month of rehab to go) so while we didn't get into the wilderness areas, it was still a much different look for me and different smells for Mighty. However, the "no mosquitoes in the Ozarks" is just an myth now for all the rains we have had produced a decent crop in the forest area. Still none around my home, for now.


Mighty and I took some day trips and no, I didn't take any pictures. I wanted to remain post idea free. Eventually it did happen. I could go places and do things with out thinking "is this post worthy?" Habits are hard to break. Though my posts stopped, one thing did pick up and that was my e- mails. Former e-mailers who had begun to rely on my posts for information, now reverted back. That was welcome. Before with me blogging, it was purely a one way conversation. They knew about my life, I knew nothing about theirs.


I have to comment on sleep. As I had to keep getting up earlier and earlier to frame a post, read those I follow and comment, my internal alarm clock was waking me at 4, sometimes 3AM. That was netting me 5 hours sleep which is not enough. Amazingly now, I am cranking out 8 glorious, uninterrupted hours of sleep each night. Suddenly I am no longer tired.


My novel reading has really picked up. Before blog, I used to read a book a week but it got where I was barely getting one read in the three weeks allowed by the library. Just didn't have time or inclination for it after working on my blog and reading many others. My need to read was satisfied.


Another thing I completely ignored when I started the blog were the two novels I was writing. Why two you ask? Because as you can probably tell, I have a pretty short attention span. Two kept me fresh and interested. Blogging was meant to be #3.



The purpose of blogging originally was to force me into discipline so I would work on my novels more. Kind of like practicing the piano. However, the blog took over and my books became frozen in time. I became addicted to the same day feed back and acknowledgment of the blog. Pretty nice.

The instant gratification of blogging replaced the solitary fun of letting fantasy characters pull me in different directions. I have now returned to my lonely drafts. Didn't realize how much I missed my characters. They most likely will never reach publication but that doesn't matter. Writing about them is for me like knitting, wood working or quilt making is for some. A pleasurable distraction. I am filled with words that must find a home.

One additional benefit from this hiatus is the weight loss. Yes, not even changing what I eat, I have lost weight simply by being more active. Who'd have thunk it.

So does that mean I will quit blogging? I hope not. I will just try to be more judicious in the amount of time I spend on my posts. Balance would really be nice.

I know I will lose some of you by not posting daily and I am so sorry about that. I have really come to treasure our daily interactions, even with those of you who only lurked, for while you did not comment, I recognized you on my site meter and you were greatly appreciated.

So I am back, sort of.

HOME OR ABROAD

Do you ever yearn for a particular place on earth you would just love to visit? Maybe it is a vast area or perhaps just a small nook with nostalgic ties, one that holds wonderful memories.

There are a countries I would love to visit like England or Ireland, the countries of my roots. To look in the faces of the people and to see if I recognize myself in them. To walk over the same land my ancestors did, to feel the same ground under my feet, the same mist, cold or warmth of sun on my face as they did would make me feel connected. At least I think it would.

We Americans are the infants on this planet. Most of us are mongrels in this country with multiple lineages. I have two, some have many and then there are the first generation, pure bred immigrants. However, the only true Americans are the Native Indians. The rest of us are relative newcomers. We are the adopted children.

While I would love to visit the countries of my origin, I also fantasize about visiting the exotic and vastly different areas like China or Africa.

When ever I see pictures of China's topography, I get the feeling that part of the world has been here so much longer than the rest of the world. It somehow looks more worn. Their culture is measured in thousands of years, not hundreds.

Africa holds a fascination for me for its wonderfully diverse wildlife and the miles of unsettled land. That to me would almost be like stepping back to the very beginning of time, much like China.

I have held a lot of these yearnings but a job, my pets, or lack of unlimited funds have kept me pretty close to home. Then I met Gary on the Internet and realized, I have really been ignoring my very own forest with my telescopic vision.

Gary France is a recently retired gentleman from the UK who decided to tour the US on a Harley. I stumbled on his blog late but the beauty of blogging is that all I missed, is just waiting for me to click on his archives and read. I have missed the immediacy but not the trip.

Gary has a wonderful, fresh eye and is the type of photographer and observer I would love to be. He has mastered the u-turn. Most often when we travel, we see things of interest but since we usually have a destination and a time frame, we often pass them by. Gary doesn't have that problem. He just stops, goes back, pulls out the camera, takes pictures and talks to the locals.

As a result, he has seen my country in a way I never have in all my 71 years and made me realize, maybe I ought to adjust the scope of my wish list. Wow, do we have an amazing country!! We know the language and the currency which is quite convenient, but that is all that is the same. We are such a diverse country. The landscapes are as different as countries in Europe.

I have lived in three vastly different locations. Ohio with its farming and mid-west values, Florida with its constant sun, sea and a melting pot of residents who come from all over to enjoy the warmth. A native Floridian is a tough find. Then I came to the Ozarks with the lovely vistas and warm people.

What Gary's blog has shown me is that I might want to keep exploring, I haven't begun to see what wonders are available to be seen within our own borders with just a little time and an open mind. I am really getting the urge for a road trip.

If you want to get a look at our country from the view of fresh eyes and a good camera, I suggest you visit USA Tour on a Harley Davidson. You will be entering the last days of his trip but I plan to hit his “Favorites so far” feature on his side bar at my leisure. I really want to thank Gary for opening my eyes to an amazing country that is totally within reach but is every bit as exotic as foreign countries. I have traveled a lot in my life but am not sure I have ever really seen.

Not too late---what say Mighty dog, you up for a road trip? Oh that is right, the cats. I have problems to work out but hope I don't let time run out before I do. The West is looking good and has never been explored by me.

Do you have places you want to see or are you perfectly content with your neighborhood?

DEAL BREAKER

Though I have been single a good portion of my adult life, I was engaged 3 times. Just could never pull the trigger after my failed marriage. This is about one of those times.

Bill was a friend of a friend. He was a known player and heart breaker so my friend some how thought he was the perfect match for me. Pretty sure that wasn't meant to be flattering.

I was also notorious for ducking in and out of relationships whenever they got serious. My marriage had really made me leery of a lifetime commitment. I do believe there were side bets when he and I met whether we would fight fiercely or find love.

Bill had finished law school but was now a career Marine. I guess he just loved service life as he had been raised in the military. Since he had a law degree, he was made a Marine Corps Judge Advocate. His job included military-specific cases, such as courts-martial, assaults, minor crimes , or perhaps personal legal counsel to fellow servicemen and women. Nothing nearly as exciting as the TV show JAG portrayed.

Marine Corps Judge Advocates are Marine officers first and lawyers second. Besides lawyer activities, in the Marines they also do things like lead infantry units. It's the officer equivalent of the "Every Marine is a rifleman" ethos. As a result, they're not "in an office" all day. Bill was definitely a Marine first.

We did hit it off with sparks flying. He was smart, quick witted, surprisingly gentle, considerate, and strikingly handsome in uniform. We were inseparable for about three weeks when he asked me to marry him. Perhaps it would have gone slower but he was on leave and anxious to make the commitment.

He was smitten and I was equally smitten so I said yes and started envisioning my life as a military wife. Being raised almost like an army brat myself, the whole idea appealed. We set the date for the following year, realizing we needed to get to know one another just a wee bit more.

Then he went back to Camp Lejeune. He bought me a Siamese kitten to snuggle with at night, wrote and called constantly. I missed him so much but he was able to get regular time off so it wasn't like I didn't see him at all. During this time, we learned about each other.

We discovered we had sharp differences regarding politics, religion, race and were poles apart in child rearing methods. In the beginning of a relationship, passion paints all those differences a bland, non-threatening color. Surely they will work themselves out is the mistaken path of new love.

Then the deal breaker happened. Have you ever had a potential mate, say or do something so startling that just wasn't tolerable? One day when Bill was on leave, he was bemoaning the fact that he was serving in peacetime. To my shock, he said that he wished America would go to war. I was a bit put off and asked him why.

“Because, I have been trained to kill and I may never get to.“ he said with total sincerity and more than a little vigor. This was not a kid but a 30+ year old.

Sometimes guys, what may impress your buds, just turns off your gal. We just do not have that warrior gene. I am pretty sure this was not a hidden serial killer impulse. It was warrior thinking that I thought had been bred out of the human race.

Any fool knows men killed in war, I just wasn't aware that some actually wanted to. That desire lived in Bill and for some reason, that changed my feelings for him that day and I could never get them back. Perhaps adding this to our many differences, was just what tipped the scales. It was my deal breaker.

As far as I know, he never realized his dream and spent entire his military career uninitiated by serving in peace time or was too old to go to the front when war did come. Today he is selling real estate in Florida and I am sure is a delightful fellow.

When you were dating and before you met Mr. or Mrs. Wonderful, what did you consider to be a deal breaker?

EVERYONE SHOULD HAVE A "JIM"

Well the family is now safely back in Ohio and I am again adjusted to just me and the critters. We had a really great visit though my back did not co operate and it went out the second day. Such a drama queen that herniated disk is.

I had washed the outside of house before they came and knew I had sprung my back but it took it a day or so to go all the way out. Then it took just one quick twist. It wasn't really bad and as long as I kept liquored up with Ibuprofen and kept moving.  I was in manageable pain during the visit.

Besides bringing their own house in the form of an RV, my brother Jim and  SIL Shirley like to make them selves useful. Shirley was quite helpful with food prep and such which really helped with my bad back problem. Jim has always been fascinated with fixing things and is really good at it.

When I lived in Florida they would come to visit and I would have a list of “to-dos” for Jim. He would have been really hurt if I hadn't. He is the only guy I know that when a repair might prove more difficult than first thought would not get frustrated but would smile and say, “Now it is getting interesting.” Problem solving makes it a sport.

I only had one chore for him, the door on my storm shelter was old and suspect. It needed rebuilding.  He took care of that right away using the lumber I all ready had. I only had to buy some anchors and screws. Then since my house is relatively new, I just didn't have any other problems---or so I thought.

Sometimes we adjust unconsciously to home failures. Once coming through the front door, Jim said “That's it. I've got to fix that.”

'Fix what?' was my thought for I did not realize something wasn't right.

It seems through the years here, the closer on my storm/screen door had gotten loose so that the door slammed quickly. After Jim adjusted it I was surprised to realize I had learned to hesitate slightly and stick out my butt when coming in the door so the storm door had a soft landing. It was a mindless action on my behalf. 

Now that it is fixed and closes slowly, I am having to break that habit of sticking my butt out to catch a door that no longer slams. I am still sticking the butt out but now quickly realize that it is no longer necessary. Lets see, it takes three weeks to break a habit. I should be butt normal in two more weeks.

He fixed a rather long list of things like that that I wasn't aware of being broken but the last thing he did really made my day. For safety reasons, my riding mower will not back up with the blade engaged. It was truly annoying and often kept me from making clean corners. Thanks to Jim, that is no longer a concern.

Now we didn't spend all the time working, we also played so don't feel too badly for Jim and Shirley.

A lot of you are married to a Jim, some of you are Jim or some of you like me, are related to one or have a Jim-like friend. If you don't have one in your life, I hope that is temporary for they are very valuable.

Well I have been away from blogging a long time and will try to catch up. Can't wait to go visit you all and see what had been happening.  I was just about one week away from breaking the blogging habit. Phew, that was close.

JUNE SWOON

Please forgive this post those of you who are sportaphobics but I need to vent.

In the month of June, my beloved Marlins have gone from being ½ game out of first place to having sole, undisputed possession of last place. It is being referred to as the June Swoon around baseball.

We have only won one game out of the last 18 Now I have the woman's approach to the game in that winning isn't everything—but gee—even I need more than one out of 18 as a reward for watching  2.5 hours almost every day. Come on fellows. You are my summer entertainment.

April and May, we played really well. Pitchers pitched, bull pens didn't fail, fielding was vastly improved and batters hit. We were all thinking post season. For the month of June however, only the bull pen is still functioning but it can't carry a team and is showing the signs of strain.

The depression on the bench is evident.

Since the start of the swoon, my young team can't buy a win. Some losses are close games, some are pure humiliation but the defeats continue to pile up. We just find a way to lose.


 Watching games has been really, really painful and the phrase, “Oh no, not again,” pops into my head early in the games. I have to remind myself that this is only a game. To the fan it is still a game but it is pure business to the owners.

Sunday, the manager resigned. I do not think he was the reason for the swoon but heads must roll.  Why former batting champs suddenly can't hit a ball out of the infield or pitchers can't find the plate have Baseball baffled.

Right now, I think it has progressed to mental and I don't know what will set them right. Summer just isn't much fun right now but I still love them, even when it is difficult to do so.

To lighten the mood, I have enclosed some baseball quotes I thought amusing and true.

"This club is playing better baseball now. Some of the players actually look fairly alert." - Mets' Manager Casey Stengel during a rough period.

“If a woman has to choose between catching a fly ball and saving an infant's life, she will choose to save the infant's life without even considering if there are men on base.” ~Dave Barry

Recently during a Marlin/Dodger ball game, a man in the stands proved the opposite of that quote. He was holding his probably six year old  daughter balanced on the back of a chair so she could see better when a foul ball came his way. He promptly dropped his daughter to catch the ball. I tried to find pictures but they were all blurry.
She was not hurt and the crowd and announcers were both stunned and amused. However the daughter did not laugh and it took her quite a while plus an ice cream cone to half way forgive Dad. She gave him the elbow and a super black look when he tried to hug her. Bad daddy. Wonder what his Father's day was like?

“Baseball is the only field of endeavor where a man can succeed three times out of ten and be considered a good performer.” ~Ted Williams

“Baseball is almost the only orderly thing in a very unorderly world. If you get three strikes, even the best lawyer in the world can't get you off.” ~Bill Veeck

“Things could be worse. Suppose your errors were counted and published every day, like those of a baseball player.” ~Author Unknown

Confucius say: "Baseball wrong - man with four balls cannot walk."~Author Unknown

And finally from John Fogerty's song “Centerfield” is the reason I hang in there all summer long.

Well, beat the drum and hold the phone - the sun came out today!
We're born again, there's new grass on the field.
A-roundin' third, and headed for home, it's a brown-eyed handsome man Anyone can understand --the way I feel.

Next game, I hope that brown-eyed handsome man heading for home will be wearing a Marlin's jersey.

Thank you, I feel better.  I hope if you are a sports fan that your team is doing better. I am positive they aren't doing worse.

CAREFUL WHAT YOU WISH FOR

There have been two things I have been wishing for most of this past year.  Well one I have wished for about 15 years and that was snow. I left Florida mainly due to 3 back to back hurricanes and a desire for cooler weather and snow.

I ended up in Arkansas for the amazing bang for your buck when buying real estate here but also because the chamber of commerce promised a decent amount of snow each year and summers that were pleasant. They told bald faced lies.

The summers hit 100 plus degrees way to many times and snow was just dustings that melted by noon. That has always been the case yet I still wished. Even whined a bit.

This year I did get a good snow that kept me house bound for three days. It was both wonderful and not so wonderful.  Hard for me to believe  but that beautiful snow actually got old by the third day.  Anyway, I could cross that wish off my list. 

The second wish came with the pandemic.  I had needed a haircut when we went into lock down over a year ago.  Oh my did I get raggedy. My hair grows rapidly.

Fortunately we were wearing masks in public so few people knew it was me and we all looked pretty unkempt anyway.  I have always had a perm in my hair but now it was long, straight as string and I had given myself a bit of a bowl cut. Sexy.

Luckily for you and me--my camera is on the fritz so I have no before or after photos.

Once I was fully vaccinated, a haircut was all I could think about. My regular beautician wasn't available so I went to this place that said "Walk Ins Welcome." Now I understand the reason they were so accommodating. They were desperate. Pretty sure repeat business is rare.

The lone beautician turned my chair away from the mirror and after a few questions, she set about turning me into a man. Yikes.

I had warned her about a few thin spots I have in the back and said I didn't want my ears cut out.  I watched as large chunks of hair fell from my head. I actually lost a pound that day. Hopefully there were other factors in that loss for a pound of hair is a bunch. 

Mercy, did she cut me short.  The ears were completely bared in spite of my request. Did you know ears grow as we age?  At least the lobes get saggy. Lordy mine are now huge.  Need to hide those suckers again.  Come on hair, grow.

Now there isn't enough hair left to roll around a curler so for a while, a perm is out. She did leave me a bit to cover up the thin spots but she practically turned me into a guy and I just can't pull it off like Jamie Lee Curtis does.  Being 80 plus with sharp features, super short hair it is not a good look.

My hair is so short that my gardening hat from before pandemic no longer fits and I have to tighten the chin strap or lose it. 

I haven't worn lipstick for almost a year because of the mask ordinance. Now I wear it everywhere I know I'll be exposed to a mirror. Earrings are now hanging from those huge ears.  I'm doing my best to put my best feminine foot forward but I guess jeans and bulky sweaters don't help my cause. 

I was cringing inside as I waited for the dreaded, "Can I help you sir?" 

However the other day I went into a small grocery store, masked up and skimpy haired when this nice older male clerk asked, "Did you find everything you needed ma'am?"  I really, really wanted to kiss him. 

Ahhh. Maybe this too shall pass. Always heard a bad haircut only lasts a couple of weeks. 

Ever really wish for something only to be disappointed when you got it?

TAGGED

I've been tagged and awarded on the same day. Go figure. Now I can see all those little mice out there scurrying for that magic X in the corner of the computers. I realize some of you run in fear at the sound of "tag or award" but I am still new enough to be very flattered and pleased by both. The kind words that accompanied the two keep me pumped up for quite a while. To me, these are posts I don't have to come up with in my aging brain. They are a thoughtful gift which is how I receive them and give them.

Today I will answer the "tag" and next week I will post the award kenju sent as it requires one word answers and that is really hard for a wordy type like me. Thank you so much Judy, I'll post yours next week.

This one traveled quite far and came from a really neat blogger buddy from India. She is probably the youngest of my readers and I am always pleased to hear from her.

Lostworld has a really cute and entertaining blog. Her post about learning to drive totally cracked me up. If you want a good chuckle, check it out. Thank you so much Lostworld.

Below are the rules of the tag.

1.I must thank the person who gave me the award and list their blog and link it
2.I must list 10 honest things about myself
3.I must put a copy of Honest Scrap logo on my blog
4.I must select at least 7 or 8 other worthy bloggers and list their links
5.I must notify the bloggers of the award and hopefully they will follow the above three requirements also.

OK, here goes with total honesty.

1. I am an intolerant person. That is to say, I am intolerant of intolerance, ergo, that makes me "intolerant" which is sad for I hate intolerance. Anyone confused yet??

2. I am a boredom eater and it is sadly obvious that I must bore easily. Properly and consistently entertained, I would be a 90 pound weakling.

3. I love the cold. You can always put clothes on to be warmer, the law only allows you to take so much off. Coats and jackets hide a flawed figure quite nicely thank you. I also think seeing your breath is cool and truthfully, cold air just smells cleaner.

4. I can not even come close to singing. Bet I could make prisoners confess with my voice alone. Water boarding is not necessary guys when you have Patti types available.

5. I am a bleeding heart liberal, not quite to the civil libertarian stage though. All extremes frighten me.

6. The "Blues" makes me happy.

7. I am a bit bonkers about the animal kingdom and am a proud tree hugger.

8. I get a kick out of temporary ( 3 days is "temporary" enough) times of "survival mode". Such as when power outages make us think of unique ways to accomplish the daily necessities. No one ever said I wasn't weird.

9. A person who can make me laugh shoots right to the top of my "want to be around" list.

10. Be warned, I don't always follow the rules exactly in tags and awards but so far have avoided the blogger police.

I would like to award the Honest Scrap to the following.

Shine on Jewels has a lovely blog about pottery, animals and photos that I wished posted more often. Hint, hint.

Frost Bottom Farm Don't ya love the title? Barry is a neat young man who will take you on New England running tours and will let you watch the chickens run and dogs play at FBF. I try not to miss his posts.

It's Just So Homer This is my political opposite but a man I admire and who can make me laugh. His comments usually crack me up.

The Cataract Club . This lady can crack me up with her very funny style of writing or occasionally bring me to tears with shared pain.

Coward's Corner With Luckie This is a fine writer who is not locked into any genre. She can make you laugh or inform with ease.

A Slower Pace A relatively new to me but very interesting blogger.

There are many more I could tag , in fact I could tag my entire blog list for they are there because I want to keep them in my reading life . So if you are on my blog list, consider yourselves tagged and awarded.

PART TWO OF A FATHER'S GIFT

As I entered the office of Alcoholics Anonymous, I was pleasantly surprised. Though the office was sparsely furnished, the people who greeted me were definitely not my mind's image of what an alcoholic would look like, but then neither was my dad. Two men and a woman greeted me. They were so clean cut and clear eyed that I started to believe that they must be the coordinators, not actual alcoholics. Quickly I was set straight.

A tall man with glasses and a buzz cut stood up with his hand outstretched. "Hello, I'm Ben, I am an alcoholic. How can we help you?"

Awkwardly at first but then feeling more comfortable, I explained my problem. I ended my story with the plea, "How do I behave around my dad to make it easier for him?"

"First," Ben said, "is your father an alcoholic?"

"The doctor said he may be but how can we tell for sure?"

Ben was watching me closely. "Your father is the only one who knows if alcohol controls him but there is a test we can give that may help."

"A blood test?" I eagerly asked.

"No." he said. "This test." and he handed me a brochure.

I read the brochure carefully. It was a series of questions. First I examined the questions from my father's view point but slowly I started applying them to my own situation.

1. Do you ever NEED a drink?
2. Do you ever drink alone?
3 Does your work performance suffer due to a previous nights drinking?
4. Do you think it is cool to be able to hold your liquor?
5. Do you ever have loss of memory due to your drinking?
6. Do you gulp your drinks?
7. Do you drink to relax or because you have problems?
8. Have you begun to drink in the morning?
9. Do you drink till you pass out?
10. Do you lie about your drinking?

I could not answer all of them for my father but I was pretty sure he got a failing grade. I personally had to honestly answer yes to three of the questions (3, 5, and 9) but thought surely 70% was at least passing. Then I read the final sentence.

If you answered yes to any ONE of these questions, it is time to take a serious look at what your drinking might be doing to you.

This hit me like a sledge hammer. My God--could I also be an alcoholic?

Ben was again watching me closely. "Anything hit home?" he asked softly.

"I'm not too sure I don't also have a problem." I laughed with out humor.

"It is common in families for more than one member to be an alcoholic. Many believe it is hereditary. Someday this will be treated like the disease it is." Ben said.

"Well, I certainly got more information that I wanted, but thank you."

I started to leave when Ben made a final offer. "You are both welcome to come to our meetings. We can help."

I was consumed with thought as I drove away. This was not at all what I had hoped to learn. Dad AND I alcoholics--no way. I looked ahead to the 40+years I should have left and I did not like the idea of never having another drink. I drank not for a need for the first drink, but to have fun and fit in. My problem was stopping after that first drink. Lately, I drank till unconsciousness or even worse, till I blacked out. It was getting worse.

To never drink again seemed the equivalent of never having fun again for the rest of my life. Only the thought of my Dad and my love for him made me resolve to give up drinking at least for a year till we got him straight. If saying I was an alcoholic helped him, then by God--I was an alcoholic.

I am not a person who can lie. Not so much for high minded reasons as for the simple fact that I am no good at it. I always forget the details. But since there was a dim possibility that I could be an alcoholic, I felt I could carry it off.

Dad recovered and came home from the hospital "dry" but not happy. I was visiting one day and we were alone so I broached the subject.

"Well Dad," I started cautiously,"it looks like both of us will be sipping sodas in the future. I am afraid I'm an alcoholic." I bit off the word "also" for Dad was visibly stiffening whenever any of us used the word alcoholic.

My thinking that he would open up after my confession was foolish. Instead he got angry with me.

"Too bad about your problem." he said coldly. "I just had a bad reaction to some alcohol. I certainly don't have a problem. I'll be fine in a couple of days."

Oops, I thought, I am out of my league here and went scurrying back to see Ben for some much needed advice.

"One of the hardest things for a person to admit to is that they are an alcoholic. It is easier to say you are a drunk. Drunk means you have to watch your drinking--alcoholic means you can NEVER drink again. This for an alcoholic foretells a very bleak future." Ben explained.

Again I felt the blow to my gut. Ben was talking about me also. Even though I had used the word alcoholic to describe myself, I had not really believed it. I had been willing to abstain for a year- but for life? Wow.-----
 
Final chapter tomorrow